Hmm I think I shall not write anymore stuffs about my practical driving lessons in my blog anymore. Whenever I write something, someone says that I am showing off when everything I wrote is the entire truth just a narration of wat happen that day. to think that it's the same person who ask me to write and that person seems uninterested to listen to my mini adventures also, shall not "show off" anymore...Grrr...
Coffers running low already, must think of ways to spend less and/or generate some income...Coming to the end of my attachment, going to be out-of-job soon. Dunno whether to find some work or rest till school reopens, next year is going to be tough, most of my frens went overseas to take a break already. No $ for me sighz think, for my case cannot rest for the month long holiday, have to find some work, hopefully to "replenish" my dwindling $ supply.
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Sunday, May 29, 2005
Driving Lesson #4
Today went for my 4th practical lesson, car died when I was trying to move up a slope from stop position. Haha too anxious according to my instructor, but nevertheless that's the only time my engine died for the whole lesson. Today we went to bukit panjang and Yew Tee to tour, every driving lesson seems like a joyride to me and my instructor. My insructor said that my driving skills on the public road is OK already that's why he never teach me how to make turns because I am doing OK, he said I just need to polish up the way I view hazards at traffic junctions. And of cos I still need to go to carpark to learn some parking and to sharpen my turning skills. then I can stop for a while and wait for my practical test. Wah so happy, my instructor actually regard me so highly, I only attended my 4th lesson leh. Anyhow today I managed to improve on my clutch -accelerator control. Not that much jerks liao, quite smooth....but i feel I must still practise more...He said after a few more lessons than must go to a carpark and practise parking already, and mabbe also moving off on slopes that I think I am quite weak, strangely I executed the same movement as I did for army trucks but it's not that smooth for car and engine even died once. Hmmm think the 2 methods are different must get the army driving out of my mind and concentrate on car one... Ah another thing, same comments from him about me every lesson, "I am too safe!"
Must quickly pass the test, so that I can drive dd around...pray pray...
Must quickly pass the test, so that I can drive dd around...pray pray...
Sunday, May 22, 2005
Driving Lesson #3
Well just finished my 3rd driving lesson, nothing eventful for this lesson. Raining the whole while. So my view is kinda foggy plus my instructor car's wiper isn't all that excellent thus no matter what speed I turn to, after every wipes the windscreen is still abit on the foggy side haha. But nvm still can see... Think his wiper is abit loose...haha
today he made me do alot of turns at the minor roads in bukit batok, right turns, left turns alot of turns turn until my head is also turning. Strangely today he never take me on the 70km/h road and let me cruise at 70km/h like he did last lesson. The moment i hit about 65km/h, he told me to turn left (the 70km/h rd is the only road from my plc to bukit batok)into bukit batok.
He taught me to use my horn at jaywalkers and to c how to react according to jaywalkers who are in the midst of crossing the road or begining to cross the road. then outside Bukit Batok Drving Center (BBDC) I got to use wat he taught me. I horned at my first jaywalker a auntie lah who was trying to cross the road at the time, the moment she step out of the kerb i sound the horn already. Haha
One thing I find puzzling about my driving lessons and/or my driving instructor. He never tell me since lesson #1 when to start turning the steering wheel or when to return the steering wheel. He only taught me things to look out when turning. Even when I am makin sharp left turns, He only told me to look out for traffic and the blind spots... never told me how to and how much to turn the steering wheel at all. all the while I have been using my "fee" to make turns.. He simply have forgotten about that or I was doing the turns fine thus he think no need to teach me the turning parts? I dunno
The moment i started driving in his car he would chit chat with me about many things non stop until we ended driving and he would play his oldies music on the radio, instructor's job like very relaxing hor? haha
Oh then today also went to top up petrol at the Esso stn beside BBDC, Drat have to squeeze in between 2 cars who are also pumping petrol at that time to get to a pump. Luckily no buang any1 of them, he still ask me whether got enough space or not, I replied yes then he told me 'squeeze' through already. he trust me the "L" driver so much ah...haha
Overall I think today my driving is OK lah think should be quite good already, however I think I still abit "gan cheong" (panicky) when driving through junctions and still the vehicle jerks abit when moving off from rest(sometimes). Have to improve on these things. Instructor also say I am too "safe", keep looking at the sides when turning...tell me to confirmed already then go, no need to scare haha..Looks like next lesson have to be more daring and aggressive abit..haha
today he made me do alot of turns at the minor roads in bukit batok, right turns, left turns alot of turns turn until my head is also turning. Strangely today he never take me on the 70km/h road and let me cruise at 70km/h like he did last lesson. The moment i hit about 65km/h, he told me to turn left (the 70km/h rd is the only road from my plc to bukit batok)into bukit batok.
He taught me to use my horn at jaywalkers and to c how to react according to jaywalkers who are in the midst of crossing the road or begining to cross the road. then outside Bukit Batok Drving Center (BBDC) I got to use wat he taught me. I horned at my first jaywalker a auntie lah who was trying to cross the road at the time, the moment she step out of the kerb i sound the horn already. Haha
One thing I find puzzling about my driving lessons and/or my driving instructor. He never tell me since lesson #1 when to start turning the steering wheel or when to return the steering wheel. He only taught me things to look out when turning. Even when I am makin sharp left turns, He only told me to look out for traffic and the blind spots... never told me how to and how much to turn the steering wheel at all. all the while I have been using my "fee" to make turns.. He simply have forgotten about that or I was doing the turns fine thus he think no need to teach me the turning parts? I dunno
The moment i started driving in his car he would chit chat with me about many things non stop until we ended driving and he would play his oldies music on the radio, instructor's job like very relaxing hor? haha
Oh then today also went to top up petrol at the Esso stn beside BBDC, Drat have to squeeze in between 2 cars who are also pumping petrol at that time to get to a pump. Luckily no buang any1 of them, he still ask me whether got enough space or not, I replied yes then he told me 'squeeze' through already. he trust me the "L" driver so much ah...haha
Overall I think today my driving is OK lah think should be quite good already, however I think I still abit "gan cheong" (panicky) when driving through junctions and still the vehicle jerks abit when moving off from rest(sometimes). Have to improve on these things. Instructor also say I am too "safe", keep looking at the sides when turning...tell me to confirmed already then go, no need to scare haha..Looks like next lesson have to be more daring and aggressive abit..haha
Sunday, May 15, 2005
Drving Lessons
Haiz just starting my practical driving lessons, not very smooth, still can be improved..here are wat happen
LEsson #1
The instructor talked to me about some "theories" about the car and stuffs for almost an hr then I drove to Yew Tee and back the whole journey taking about 30mins. basically the instructor wans me to learn how to keep in lane and practice the clutch "biting point" and accelerator control. Alas my experience with driving is with big army trucks where their clutch and accelerator are stiffer. anyway no excuses, I kinda panick cos I am not used to the vehicle so the vehicle was jerking when it move from rest many of the times. anyway the instuctor complained that I was too slow though i was driving at about 50km/h whenever I can. Next time will try to drive faster.
Lesson #2
Today instuctor wan me to practice moving off without jerking, hmm initial stages I was doing quite well and I managed to get moving without much jerks. Then we drove to bukit batok where I drove at 70km/h at the long stretch of road. Ah this time he never complain that I was too slow. Then at those normal roads I drove at 50+ km/h this time he complain that I was too fast haha. Anyway today my leg control wasn't that good cos at some stage my legs were wobbling(make me throw clutch) and I dunno why thus today the car stalled a couple of times, 3 to be exact. haha mabbe I never adjusted the seat properly cos my heel seem to be stuck to the floor board thus I can't release the clutch properly. Will have to improve on this in the next lesson. Next we practice turning right at a junction where there are more than 1 right turning lane. Drat...I am too used to turning into the left-most lane thus when I switch to turn in the right-most lane I don't know the exact way to turn, i move straight then turn when i am in line with the lane(this is the method for turing into the left-most lane) then I got horned by the car beside me cos i was cutting into his lane..haha have to get this into my head that I am not driving a MID vehicle anymore...still need alot of improvements ah..like the checking blind spot part keep forgetting cos nv do it for long time already and I keep making wide turns(too used to long trucks grrr..)..haha
I think I trying to do too many things at same time thus make me very gan cheong (panick) must try to keep calm and relax abit.
LEsson #1
The instructor talked to me about some "theories" about the car and stuffs for almost an hr then I drove to Yew Tee and back the whole journey taking about 30mins. basically the instructor wans me to learn how to keep in lane and practice the clutch "biting point" and accelerator control. Alas my experience with driving is with big army trucks where their clutch and accelerator are stiffer. anyway no excuses, I kinda panick cos I am not used to the vehicle so the vehicle was jerking when it move from rest many of the times. anyway the instuctor complained that I was too slow though i was driving at about 50km/h whenever I can. Next time will try to drive faster.
Lesson #2
Today instuctor wan me to practice moving off without jerking, hmm initial stages I was doing quite well and I managed to get moving without much jerks. Then we drove to bukit batok where I drove at 70km/h at the long stretch of road. Ah this time he never complain that I was too slow. Then at those normal roads I drove at 50+ km/h this time he complain that I was too fast haha. Anyway today my leg control wasn't that good cos at some stage my legs were wobbling(make me throw clutch) and I dunno why thus today the car stalled a couple of times, 3 to be exact. haha mabbe I never adjusted the seat properly cos my heel seem to be stuck to the floor board thus I can't release the clutch properly. Will have to improve on this in the next lesson. Next we practice turning right at a junction where there are more than 1 right turning lane. Drat...I am too used to turning into the left-most lane thus when I switch to turn in the right-most lane I don't know the exact way to turn, i move straight then turn when i am in line with the lane(this is the method for turing into the left-most lane) then I got horned by the car beside me cos i was cutting into his lane..haha have to get this into my head that I am not driving a MID vehicle anymore...still need alot of improvements ah..like the checking blind spot part keep forgetting cos nv do it for long time already and I keep making wide turns(too used to long trucks grrr..)..haha
I think I trying to do too many things at same time thus make me very gan cheong (panick) must try to keep calm and relax abit.
Saturday, May 07, 2005
Starting Driving lessons
Ah quite a busy day today, went to take my Final Theory test today, took only 20mins to finish the 50 qns which is even faster than the time I took for my Basic Theory Test.
Oh well hopefully I can pass the FTT. Pray...pray
then afternoon at 4pm started my 1st driving lesson...The instructor talk about everything about driving for an hour then let me drive for 30mins. drove to Yew Tee and back. Ah today didn't drive very well cos long time no drive already plus the controls are not as stiff as military vehicles. thus the feel is different guess I need more practice to be famalise with the car controls.
then the instuctor wan me to learn drv for 2 hrs per session...sighz gg to b tough on my pockets liao ...anyway promised my dd that I will learn and pass driving.
so guess the most important thing is to pass driving and not the $ part...
Oh well hopefully I can pass the FTT. Pray...pray
then afternoon at 4pm started my 1st driving lesson...The instructor talk about everything about driving for an hour then let me drive for 30mins. drove to Yew Tee and back. Ah today didn't drive very well cos long time no drive already plus the controls are not as stiff as military vehicles. thus the feel is different guess I need more practice to be famalise with the car controls.
then the instuctor wan me to learn drv for 2 hrs per session...sighz gg to b tough on my pockets liao ...anyway promised my dd that I will learn and pass driving.
so guess the most important thing is to pass driving and not the $ part...
Sunday, April 24, 2005
Panicky
Sighz rather panicky these few weeks. All because of DD's parents discovering that she now owns a car. Worried about wat? Well
1)Worried that she don't have the discipline to save for the car insurance, road tax ...then until the nearing the year end then she start to panick and save like mad.
2)Worried that her parents would ask her to buy these buy that for her "new" car until she has not enough $ to spend for the month.
3)Worried that her parents or bro would ask her to "lend" her car to her bro for some "driving lessons" around the carpark.
4)Worried that she will lend her car to her frens/relatives watever then they will buang(involved in accident). (And of cos won't pay for repairs) or she herself get involved in those accidents(non fatal) then she wun have $ to send in the car for repairs because of 1,2.
5)Worried that she would wan to "Show Off" then take her frens/relatives watever on joyrides to far places which will waste alot of petrol causing her to exceed her monthly budget.
6)Worried that because of 1,2,4 and 5 she will used up the $ meant for marriage.
This is why last week, I've sort of lost control of my emotions when she went to some re-spraying(which i feel is not needed). I dunno if she did sense that I really dun wan her to go, or that she nv did considered my feelings at all. I do realise that she would want to restore all minor defects to her new baby but to me I look at the bigger picture, think that it's better to let it be for the moment. Sometimes I think our roles are swapped, I am the more sensitive female and she is the male. Anyway these matter is over liao...so no pt talking abt it anymore.
Aiyah I also dunno why I became so paranoid, after all it isn't my car. Perharps I am also a bit attached to it as I went with her to every stage from the booking of the car to the collection of the car.
I kept saying that the $ for marriage I will save myself, but perharps I dun really meant what i said. I do hope that she can contribute some amount, but wif her parent's constant "gold panning" and her reluctant to refuse them I know it's gonna to be hard.However in my heart I do wish that she could at least try. I don't wan myself to be debt-ridden just because of marriage. With the job market so insecure, it's even more un-advisable to chalk up so much debts.
Planning to learn driving, but can't seem to find a suitable drving instructor, sianz cheap and preferably some1 acquainted, worried that i may get cheated by some stranger(after all planning to take from private instructor) lah haha. Those who collect fees from you then "disappear"
1)Worried that she don't have the discipline to save for the car insurance, road tax ...then until the nearing the year end then she start to panick and save like mad.
2)Worried that her parents would ask her to buy these buy that for her "new" car until she has not enough $ to spend for the month.
3)Worried that her parents or bro would ask her to "lend" her car to her bro for some "driving lessons" around the carpark.
4)Worried that she will lend her car to her frens/relatives watever then they will buang(involved in accident). (And of cos won't pay for repairs) or she herself get involved in those accidents(non fatal) then she wun have $ to send in the car for repairs because of 1,2.
5)Worried that she would wan to "Show Off" then take her frens/relatives watever on joyrides to far places which will waste alot of petrol causing her to exceed her monthly budget.
6)Worried that because of 1,2,4 and 5 she will used up the $ meant for marriage.
This is why last week, I've sort of lost control of my emotions when she went to some re-spraying(which i feel is not needed). I dunno if she did sense that I really dun wan her to go, or that she nv did considered my feelings at all. I do realise that she would want to restore all minor defects to her new baby but to me I look at the bigger picture, think that it's better to let it be for the moment. Sometimes I think our roles are swapped, I am the more sensitive female and she is the male. Anyway these matter is over liao...so no pt talking abt it anymore.
Aiyah I also dunno why I became so paranoid, after all it isn't my car. Perharps I am also a bit attached to it as I went with her to every stage from the booking of the car to the collection of the car.
I kept saying that the $ for marriage I will save myself, but perharps I dun really meant what i said. I do hope that she can contribute some amount, but wif her parent's constant "gold panning" and her reluctant to refuse them I know it's gonna to be hard.However in my heart I do wish that she could at least try. I don't wan myself to be debt-ridden just because of marriage. With the job market so insecure, it's even more un-advisable to chalk up so much debts.
Planning to learn driving, but can't seem to find a suitable drving instructor, sianz cheap and preferably some1 acquainted, worried that i may get cheated by some stranger(after all planning to take from private instructor) lah haha. Those who collect fees from you then "disappear"
Monday, April 18, 2005
Let It Be...
SighZzz dd says she hated me now...
Perharps I did something wrong in agreeing on sat nite to let her send into the workshop but in fact I was silently hoping that she could back off at the last minute.
I keep telling myself to let it go, forget it...and I almost did..
then when the whole thing took so long until we can't even meet yesterday I became very angry again, Somemore when dd called to informed me that the whole thing could take quite a while, she sounded happy, like she thinks tat the $ was well-spent and it should b spent...All along to me it's a total waste...
the more I think abt it the siller I feel abt the whole thing then I could turn to no one but to write them all down...
I always think that we could sort things out but she got angry after reading what I wrote in the heat of the moment...now she dun even wan to talk to me...Fine
Let me be my fault, all my fault... I shouldn't have been too meddlesome, shouldn't have expect so much frm her, should have let her do everything her way, shouldn't have talk so much or provided her advices/solutions in the hope that she will follow them...(she never did anyway, facing me she has a mind of her own, facing others she will be manipulated by them)
Ya u can say I am calculating becos I keep reminding her abt $, but wat can I do? u wan me to stand and watch she sink deeper into the mire? or wait until everything's too late then start to voice out. I wan her to have a budget so that she will have enough to spend every month and possibly even some spare cash... No need to dig into her savings at all..U imagine this, if every month u have to dig into ur savings cos u are over budget then very soon even this little savings will run out. I dun wan her to develop this happen of keep touching her savings only use for emergencies...Is that wrong? Is that calculatives? why can't she see the hidden agenda?
She said she does have marriage on her minds..ya like keep saying that she wans this and tats for marriage. So this is her way of saying she have marriage on her mind right? As I mentioned earlier, mabbe I was wrong to expect too much frm her or expect her to put in the same effort as me..but in order to let her b a happy n beautiful bride I am constantly cracking my head on how to save more $, scimping and pinching everyday, then sudddenly u saw this "extravagant" thing happen, who won't be upset? At that instance I really feel that all my efforts are wasted u noe? Why can't she view it this way?
In my views, I dun think pacifying will get anyway, after all she've been pacifying her(her mum) and giving in all these years already but then wat happened? the same thing happen over and over again. So I feel perharps a hard approach would be better. Men are like tis u give them an in they wan a yard... when u r firm and they noe that they cannot gain any advantage then they will back off... After all they are mum n daughter so can't possibly carry on like tis 4ever...TO me she's please cos she has got her way and to put it crudely is "gloating" I dun understand why she's so happy over this...
She always say I dun understand her but have she taken some time to care about how I felt anot? HAve she ever taken time to note that throughout all these while she have never really listen and carry out any of my words, SHe will always listen to everyone except me. Wat other people told her is advice wat I told her is all crap.
I am sorry if I am too direct, I never chew my words...I was not born to please but to solve problems in the most correct way.
Who says I dun understand her? it's precisely this that I am so worried for her.
-I noe her mum is like that so I must ask her to stand up for herself keep giving in is definitely not a solution
-I noe she don't save that's why I ask her don't if possible touch her savings unless it's for emergencies, tis case is a non emergency and she went to touch of cos I am worried for her...
-I noe she will get angry(but didn't expect her to be so upset) but some1 will have to be the bad guy right?to constantly remind her else sooner or later everything will return to sq 1.
Anyway I've decided to give up, If she wants to carry on like this Let it be...I wash my hands off everything then perharps she will be happier and wun be sandwiched between her mum n me... I'll continue to play 2nd fiddle, shut my mouth up and just save $ quietly myself.Perharps this is the most ideal solution to her.After all in her eyes, I am nothing but a calculative, unreasonable, hard feeling , ignorant idiot who does not noe anything but scolding people....
My intentions not being appreciated is 1 thing, but being misunderstood is another...and it's really saddening
Perharps I did something wrong in agreeing on sat nite to let her send into the workshop but in fact I was silently hoping that she could back off at the last minute.
I keep telling myself to let it go, forget it...and I almost did..
then when the whole thing took so long until we can't even meet yesterday I became very angry again, Somemore when dd called to informed me that the whole thing could take quite a while, she sounded happy, like she thinks tat the $ was well-spent and it should b spent...All along to me it's a total waste...
the more I think abt it the siller I feel abt the whole thing then I could turn to no one but to write them all down...
I always think that we could sort things out but she got angry after reading what I wrote in the heat of the moment...now she dun even wan to talk to me...Fine
Let me be my fault, all my fault... I shouldn't have been too meddlesome, shouldn't have expect so much frm her, should have let her do everything her way, shouldn't have talk so much or provided her advices/solutions in the hope that she will follow them...(she never did anyway, facing me she has a mind of her own, facing others she will be manipulated by them)
Ya u can say I am calculating becos I keep reminding her abt $, but wat can I do? u wan me to stand and watch she sink deeper into the mire? or wait until everything's too late then start to voice out. I wan her to have a budget so that she will have enough to spend every month and possibly even some spare cash... No need to dig into her savings at all..U imagine this, if every month u have to dig into ur savings cos u are over budget then very soon even this little savings will run out. I dun wan her to develop this happen of keep touching her savings only use for emergencies...Is that wrong? Is that calculatives? why can't she see the hidden agenda?
She said she does have marriage on her minds..ya like keep saying that she wans this and tats for marriage. So this is her way of saying she have marriage on her mind right? As I mentioned earlier, mabbe I was wrong to expect too much frm her or expect her to put in the same effort as me..but in order to let her b a happy n beautiful bride I am constantly cracking my head on how to save more $, scimping and pinching everyday, then sudddenly u saw this "extravagant" thing happen, who won't be upset? At that instance I really feel that all my efforts are wasted u noe? Why can't she view it this way?
In my views, I dun think pacifying will get anyway, after all she've been pacifying her(her mum) and giving in all these years already but then wat happened? the same thing happen over and over again. So I feel perharps a hard approach would be better. Men are like tis u give them an in they wan a yard... when u r firm and they noe that they cannot gain any advantage then they will back off... After all they are mum n daughter so can't possibly carry on like tis 4ever...TO me she's please cos she has got her way and to put it crudely is "gloating" I dun understand why she's so happy over this...
She always say I dun understand her but have she taken some time to care about how I felt anot? HAve she ever taken time to note that throughout all these while she have never really listen and carry out any of my words, SHe will always listen to everyone except me. Wat other people told her is advice wat I told her is all crap.
I am sorry if I am too direct, I never chew my words...I was not born to please but to solve problems in the most correct way.
Who says I dun understand her? it's precisely this that I am so worried for her.
-I noe her mum is like that so I must ask her to stand up for herself keep giving in is definitely not a solution
-I noe she don't save that's why I ask her don't if possible touch her savings unless it's for emergencies, tis case is a non emergency and she went to touch of cos I am worried for her...
-I noe she will get angry(but didn't expect her to be so upset) but some1 will have to be the bad guy right?to constantly remind her else sooner or later everything will return to sq 1.
Anyway I've decided to give up, If she wants to carry on like this Let it be...I wash my hands off everything then perharps she will be happier and wun be sandwiched between her mum n me... I'll continue to play 2nd fiddle, shut my mouth up and just save $ quietly myself.Perharps this is the most ideal solution to her.After all in her eyes, I am nothing but a calculative, unreasonable, hard feeling , ignorant idiot who does not noe anything but scolding people....
My intentions not being appreciated is 1 thing, but being misunderstood is another...and it's really saddening
Sunday, April 17, 2005
DD's angry
Now dd is angry wif me..saying that I am not supportive of her and keep scolding her...Nv understand her predicament etc...
Truth is in fact I did ok...I noe her mum is like that but the best way to keep her from doing all these stupid things is not to give in to her let them noe that u are firm then they will noe u can't b pushed...
I just dun understand why she can't see the whole picture, the bigger picture...I am not trying cause a rift in her family but if she keeps giving in like that then there will be no end to trouble only when the other party noes u can't be pushed around then the whole thing will stop.
I dun understand why she cannot realise that everything is for her own good... Not that I feel totally right, in fact I do agree that mabbe my tone was slightly harsh but it's all due to the fact tat I am concern for her...afterall the blog was written when I am terribly upset due also to the fact tat cos of the stupid car thing I didn't managed to meet her today and waited like an idiot the whole day.
I think the best way to help her is to help and advice her to make the correct decision, not to just blindly support her in everything she does.If that's the case then i would be nothing more than a pet.
I dun understand why I must also b the lamb that's sacrifice, everytime she will take the side of her mum/relatives but never on my side, u called that same freq?
If she wans to be angry I also can't do anything.
SighZzz...
Truth is in fact I did ok...I noe her mum is like that but the best way to keep her from doing all these stupid things is not to give in to her let them noe that u are firm then they will noe u can't b pushed...
I just dun understand why she can't see the whole picture, the bigger picture...I am not trying cause a rift in her family but if she keeps giving in like that then there will be no end to trouble only when the other party noes u can't be pushed around then the whole thing will stop.
I dun understand why she cannot realise that everything is for her own good... Not that I feel totally right, in fact I do agree that mabbe my tone was slightly harsh but it's all due to the fact tat I am concern for her...afterall the blog was written when I am terribly upset due also to the fact tat cos of the stupid car thing I didn't managed to meet her today and waited like an idiot the whole day.
I think the best way to help her is to help and advice her to make the correct decision, not to just blindly support her in everything she does.If that's the case then i would be nothing more than a pet.
I dun understand why I must also b the lamb that's sacrifice, everytime she will take the side of her mum/relatives but never on my side, u called that same freq?
If she wans to be angry I also can't do anything.
SighZzz...
Saturday, April 09, 2005
Expectations of a SG guy
SighZzzz I think it's very hard to be a SG guy because of the many expectations that is expected on u...that u are suppose to have..
If Guy can't get into Uni, then he's useless,
but if he gets into Uni and then can't work which equals to no $$ then he still useless
If Guy thinks he's not cut out to be some boss or big shot then he's not ambitious and thus useless..
If all he wants is to be happy and live out the rest of his life then his thinking is wrong(not ambitious enuff) and he's still useless
Ask yourself how many people can be no. 1s? surely there must be thousands who are not no. 1 right? How many CEOs can there be? how many Presidents can there be?
All those who aren't able to reach the top or doesn't think abt reaching the top are all stereotyped as being useless or "mei chu xi". Think that's a bit unfair to the majority of the SG population. Cos I think the numbers of non CEOs far exceeds the num of CEOs. The num of non Uni grads still exceeds the num of Uni grads. Try telling the majority that they are useless... Ha Ha
Many gals(obviously or rather their mums) wan to marry rich and famous guys. How many are there? Most probably they will end up marrying the same guy and they will be kept in the dark...
Is this wat they wan?
If Guy can't get into Uni, then he's useless,
but if he gets into Uni and then can't work which equals to no $$ then he still useless
If Guy thinks he's not cut out to be some boss or big shot then he's not ambitious and thus useless..
If all he wants is to be happy and live out the rest of his life then his thinking is wrong(not ambitious enuff) and he's still useless
Ask yourself how many people can be no. 1s? surely there must be thousands who are not no. 1 right? How many CEOs can there be? how many Presidents can there be?
All those who aren't able to reach the top or doesn't think abt reaching the top are all stereotyped as being useless or "mei chu xi". Think that's a bit unfair to the majority of the SG population. Cos I think the numbers of non CEOs far exceeds the num of CEOs. The num of non Uni grads still exceeds the num of Uni grads. Try telling the majority that they are useless... Ha Ha
Many gals(obviously or rather their mums) wan to marry rich and famous guys. How many are there? Most probably they will end up marrying the same guy and they will be kept in the dark...
Is this wat they wan?
Sunday, March 13, 2005
Feeling Down...
Sighzzz these few days dunno why have been feeling quite down coupled with the super warm weather...urgh...,
1st thing, my bro just finished his BMT, and came back to stay for 2 weeks before he gets his next posting. He's been complaining that his allowance is very little, he's getting $350 and my mum feels that he has not enough to spend thus keep buying things like shirts, pants ,wallets and other necessities for him. Ok I know that i shouldn't feel that way but I feel that she's practising favoritism, which makes me quite upset cos when i was in army I dun rem getting such treatments and what's more my allowance at that time was even less, $220 only...He's getting $130 more already can't he take care of himself and buy the stuffs he need himself? Grrr...
Seems that no 1 care abt me anymore...
2nd thing, been quite worried whether I will be able to save enough $$ to get married with my beloved dd.Dunno why,It's seems that the more I try to save, the more I would need spend. And though I am trying my best already it seems I am not making much progress,at most $300 every month and then in between my stuffs break down, i.e. my alarm clock spoil then I have to spend $$ to get a new one.... Grr...why? is it so hard to save $$? I've been trying very hard, very tired already...My dd says she wans to save as much as possible but she's been living a pampered life(mabbe she dosen't realise it) since young so don't really expect her to be able to save much, only hope is that she don't overspend than I'll b more than happy...
Many things I wan, I also refrain myself from buying...Pathetic? Now I really wish to spend some $$ just to please myself(and vent my frustration) but I noe that after i spend I will regret it cos i could have save the $$ for better use...
Then her family sigh...Keep associating wealth with a man's achievement and put very high expectations for me to achieve else I would be deemed "Mei Chu Xi"(worthless) by them. Sometimes I think my dd is also affected by this labelling. All I wan is to live happily Is that too much to ask? Why can't they have some sympathy on us, the men of this generation? Everything they say "it's a man's responsibility" I am not trying to shrink from responsibility but why don't we swap places and see how they will feel? Saying want this want that is easy, everything is easier said than done...Sometimes really feel like giving everything up lor...cos seems like no matter wat I do also can't meet the expectations...sighz...
Well nvm what can I do? sighzzz just have to press on lor else how? Sometimes it's just so hard to be a man...just wan to shout:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! to vent my frustrations....
1st thing, my bro just finished his BMT, and came back to stay for 2 weeks before he gets his next posting. He's been complaining that his allowance is very little, he's getting $350 and my mum feels that he has not enough to spend thus keep buying things like shirts, pants ,wallets and other necessities for him. Ok I know that i shouldn't feel that way but I feel that she's practising favoritism, which makes me quite upset cos when i was in army I dun rem getting such treatments and what's more my allowance at that time was even less, $220 only...He's getting $130 more already can't he take care of himself and buy the stuffs he need himself? Grrr...
Seems that no 1 care abt me anymore...
2nd thing, been quite worried whether I will be able to save enough $$ to get married with my beloved dd.Dunno why,It's seems that the more I try to save, the more I would need spend. And though I am trying my best already it seems I am not making much progress,at most $300 every month and then in between my stuffs break down, i.e. my alarm clock spoil then I have to spend $$ to get a new one.... Grr...why? is it so hard to save $$? I've been trying very hard, very tired already...My dd says she wans to save as much as possible but she's been living a pampered life(mabbe she dosen't realise it) since young so don't really expect her to be able to save much, only hope is that she don't overspend than I'll b more than happy...
Many things I wan, I also refrain myself from buying...Pathetic? Now I really wish to spend some $$ just to please myself(and vent my frustration) but I noe that after i spend I will regret it cos i could have save the $$ for better use...
Then her family sigh...Keep associating wealth with a man's achievement and put very high expectations for me to achieve else I would be deemed "Mei Chu Xi"(worthless) by them. Sometimes I think my dd is also affected by this labelling. All I wan is to live happily Is that too much to ask? Why can't they have some sympathy on us, the men of this generation? Everything they say "it's a man's responsibility" I am not trying to shrink from responsibility but why don't we swap places and see how they will feel? Saying want this want that is easy, everything is easier said than done...Sometimes really feel like giving everything up lor...cos seems like no matter wat I do also can't meet the expectations...sighz...
Well nvm what can I do? sighzzz just have to press on lor else how? Sometimes it's just so hard to be a man...just wan to shout:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! to vent my frustrations....
Saturday, March 05, 2005
"I'm Worried, I'm so worried"
This few days feeling quite vex becos of dd's carcar prob abit worried that she can't save enuff for the car or because of the car she have to live like a pauper... u can say I am now pondering whether urging her to buy the car is a good thing or a bad thing...
Reasons why I encourage to buy:
1)It's always her dream to own her car, and I feel she'll b happier if she do have one.
2)Car prices are cheap now, may not be able to afford in the future
3)wan to make use of this opportunity to let her learn how to save money
4)Prevent her from giving her parents more money (>500) so as to protect herself
5)Even if she don't buy, her money will also go to some other place and b lost forever without a trace.
6)Let her gain some "face" back.
Reasons why I am having 2nd tots:
1)she can't curb herself from spending more $$ even though she had planned to. She dosen't have the self-discipline and/or she is just not firm enough to put plans into actions.
2)worried that she'll have to suffer due to suddenly having much less to spend
3)Her parents will keep "borrowing" $200-$300 from her every month(on top of her allowance and she don't know how to reject them), To be honest she can't afford to lend them $200 when she is paying for the car lor.
just recieved a car from the car agent,that our orange picanto is coming, already paid upfront $2k now need to pay another $800 for 1st instalment and insurance. meaning I'll have to come up with another $400. Actually it's quite a heartache for me to part with the $400. cos it really take much effort for me to save up to the amt of $$ i have now. I hope this will be a lesson to her to teach her the virtues of savings. I am still a student yet i managed to amass $6K and at 1 pt I have $8K. It's not easy considering I have almost no income. But i guess this time the $400 I have to give to help her fufill her dreams, just hope it's not a short-lived 1. To be honest, I don't have much expectations of recouping the $2.4K from her and i don't want to add to her burden. If she can't "repay" the "loan" then nvm lor. I'll just slowly take my time to save back the $$ again but I guess $2.4k is just abt the max I can part with cos i don't want the $$ in my UOB to drop below $5K unless there's a emergency then that I've nothing to say.
I've been telling my dd to save up some years already, but that time she still have to study and thus have to come up with alot of $$ every year to pay her PT degree fees.Somemore she still have to satisfy her parent's "greed" for more allowance.( To me it's just to brag abt it in front of relatives n neighbours) thus i dont't blame her for having little or no savings that time. But it's been 6 months since she grad and though she's working her savings is still less than $2K.(see my FOR pt 3 and 5).Put it crudely I am not working, my income is almost 0 mabbe she can take a page frm me, I still managed to save a few $Ks, I do believe if I can do it so can the rest of the people even more so for those who are working and have a stable income. Perharps if she had heeded my advice earlier and start saving some $$ a few years back things will b different today, she'll b able to get her things she wan as and when she wan.Anyway no use crying over spilled milk wat's pass had pass.Just forget it.Just start from now.
I don't know what she take me for, but I do take her very seriously though we're not legally married, I've already considered her to b like a wife to me. I tell her almost everything and discuss with her over most matters(say except those that I forgot or those that need a speedy resolution). To me she give me the feeling that she will only come to me when she has a problem. example the insurance case, I don't even know that she bought a policy until she have already subscriped to it for almost year. Then i only came to know abt it when she wanted to terminate. In other stuffs though she came to seek my advice and though after we've discuss and come to a agreement on the next action step, she'll not execute it. Why is that so? Is it bcos I am not working and inexperienced so my advices are mostly "rubbish"? or is it I am just simply taken for granted? I dunno...*sigh*
Breakdown of dd's pay and my calculations:
income:
Take home pay :$1880
fixed expenditures:
Car monthly instalments :$285
Home allowance(home Tax) :$500
Season parking (monthly) :$75
car insurance (monthly) :~$200
var expenditures:
Food :$100 ($5 every meal,a month ~20 working days $5x20=100)
Transport :$~50 ($2 everyday($0.83 a trip) + some unexpected trips)
Car petrol,parking :$50(conservative figure hopefully can meet)
coupons, cash card
thus she still should have $620 if my calculations are correct and she still have to spend on some hidden stuffs like facials, Amore membership, etc...
Well hope everything work out well...well just voicing out my tots no hard feelings...just feel better after voicing out my concerns...
Sorry DD okok?
Reasons why I encourage to buy:
1)It's always her dream to own her car, and I feel she'll b happier if she do have one.
2)Car prices are cheap now, may not be able to afford in the future
3)wan to make use of this opportunity to let her learn how to save money
4)Prevent her from giving her parents more money (>500) so as to protect herself
5)Even if she don't buy, her money will also go to some other place and b lost forever without a trace.
6)Let her gain some "face" back.
Reasons why I am having 2nd tots:
1)she can't curb herself from spending more $$ even though she had planned to. She dosen't have the self-discipline and/or she is just not firm enough to put plans into actions.
2)worried that she'll have to suffer due to suddenly having much less to spend
3)Her parents will keep "borrowing" $200-$300 from her every month(on top of her allowance and she don't know how to reject them), To be honest she can't afford to lend them $200 when she is paying for the car lor.
just recieved a car from the car agent,that our orange picanto is coming, already paid upfront $2k now need to pay another $800 for 1st instalment and insurance. meaning I'll have to come up with another $400. Actually it's quite a heartache for me to part with the $400. cos it really take much effort for me to save up to the amt of $$ i have now. I hope this will be a lesson to her to teach her the virtues of savings. I am still a student yet i managed to amass $6K and at 1 pt I have $8K. It's not easy considering I have almost no income. But i guess this time the $400 I have to give to help her fufill her dreams, just hope it's not a short-lived 1. To be honest, I don't have much expectations of recouping the $2.4K from her and i don't want to add to her burden. If she can't "repay" the "loan" then nvm lor. I'll just slowly take my time to save back the $$ again but I guess $2.4k is just abt the max I can part with cos i don't want the $$ in my UOB to drop below $5K unless there's a emergency then that I've nothing to say.
I've been telling my dd to save up some years already, but that time she still have to study and thus have to come up with alot of $$ every year to pay her PT degree fees.Somemore she still have to satisfy her parent's "greed" for more allowance.( To me it's just to brag abt it in front of relatives n neighbours) thus i dont't blame her for having little or no savings that time. But it's been 6 months since she grad and though she's working her savings is still less than $2K.(see my FOR pt 3 and 5).Put it crudely I am not working, my income is almost 0 mabbe she can take a page frm me, I still managed to save a few $Ks, I do believe if I can do it so can the rest of the people even more so for those who are working and have a stable income. Perharps if she had heeded my advice earlier and start saving some $$ a few years back things will b different today, she'll b able to get her things she wan as and when she wan.Anyway no use crying over spilled milk wat's pass had pass.Just forget it.Just start from now.
I don't know what she take me for, but I do take her very seriously though we're not legally married, I've already considered her to b like a wife to me. I tell her almost everything and discuss with her over most matters(say except those that I forgot or those that need a speedy resolution). To me she give me the feeling that she will only come to me when she has a problem. example the insurance case, I don't even know that she bought a policy until she have already subscriped to it for almost year. Then i only came to know abt it when she wanted to terminate. In other stuffs though she came to seek my advice and though after we've discuss and come to a agreement on the next action step, she'll not execute it. Why is that so? Is it bcos I am not working and inexperienced so my advices are mostly "rubbish"? or is it I am just simply taken for granted? I dunno...*sigh*
Breakdown of dd's pay and my calculations:
income:
Take home pay :$1880
fixed expenditures:
Car monthly instalments :$285
Home allowance(home Tax) :$500
Season parking (monthly) :$75
car insurance (monthly) :~$200
var expenditures:
Food :$100 ($5 every meal,a month ~20 working days $5x20=100)
Transport :$~50 ($2 everyday($0.83 a trip) + some unexpected trips)
Car petrol,parking :$50(conservative figure hopefully can meet)
coupons, cash card
thus she still should have $620 if my calculations are correct and she still have to spend on some hidden stuffs like facials, Amore membership, etc...
Well hope everything work out well...well just voicing out my tots no hard feelings...just feel better after voicing out my concerns...
Sorry DD okok?
Thursday, March 03, 2005
Money Woes
Grrrr.... today feeling quite frustrated cos had a argument wif my dd over some $$ matters...situation is like this, earlier she has decided that she won't give more than the $500 allowance including fees for the graduation photo shoot that she's gg to take. The shoot itself costs $488, abit extravagant right? ok but nvm since mabbe to her this is the proudest moment in her life to be a graduate. then including makeup for her grandmas, the cost should be around $600. then she've already paid $300 for the shoot alone and then give another $500 to her mum. so altogther this month she've spend $800 , and previously as agreed she say this month she'll not spend more than $500(includ allowance)...so can u see wat's happening? I feel very disappointed bcos I feel that if one make some promises, they should fufill it, if say dun give more than $500 then must keep it tat way mah.else people will keep on pushing and pushing..u give them a inch, they wan a yard. that's the way ppl are. I feel that my dd should protect herself lor and not keep being so submissive to her u-know-who. She should think for herself also...not say that she dosen't give them any allowance.
The reason i 'encourage' her to buy her car is to let her learn how to save. Frankly speaking her family dosen't have a good saving culture, They'll just spend and think later. So when there's some situation that requires $$, they'll just go 'borrow(or rather extort)' $$ from my dd which i feel is very wrong lor... I wan my dd to learn the virtues of saving. I never expect her to be as frugal as me(I spend only abt $200 a month),i've been taught since young to save $$.For my brothers and I, usually we'll only spend 1/2 of our pocket $$ and save the rest..but it's not for their case.
when they wan something then they start saving for it else they just spend everything.
Frankly I'm unhappy because my dd isn't firm enough to stick to wat she has said or agreed. When her ... wants $$, even though she has made up her mind not to give any more $$ for the month she'll still give. She's just too soft hearted. And she said her dad trying to shelter them and not make them lose face or watever. To me, their lifestyle is simply too extravagant. If not so well off then live a not-so-well-off life lah. No need for top of the range audio sys, BIG TV, fastest computer,NEWEST MP3 etc... I'm still living w/o air conditioning u noe and I'm quite satisfied.
Like her dad, i'm also trying to protect her, but not frm outsiders but frm her own family. I feel that they are treating her like a $$ tree. She must noe how to stand up for herself, have her own principles, NO means NO. YES means YES. Simple as tat. I don't want to see the scenerio whereby her car gets tow away for a few months stay at Maybank's car pound or that her life is so miserable bcos of the car. her salary is definitely enough to support a OPC but she has no xtra $$ to give to her parents for NEW gadgets. That's why I wan her to protect herself...If come to the point whereby i've have to stand up for her that would be disasterous, I dun wan to sour relationship between me and her parents that would put her in a tight spot i noe.
I know she didn't anyhow spend her $$ but if she gave the $$ she saved up to her parents for her bro's hi-tech gadgets that wat's the pt? It'll still come one full circle to sq 1.
I never expect her to return the $2k I gave for the downpayment and I never expected her to contribute any $$ for our future marriage purpose athough I hope that she'll be able to contribute some. All this while i've been trying to save as much as possible. I'm very tired also u noe, everyday lunchtime look for the cheapest food possible, control myself not to buy some things that I wish I could have,how to save more $$. Imagine if I am like her, dun have the habit of saving and dun even think of marriage at all then wat will happen mabbe the whole marriage thing will only b a dream. cos even 5-6 years down the rd we'll still b penniless. Is that the ideal situation. I dun understand why my dd keep thinking that my plan to marry at 28 is termed 'marry early' is 28++ yrs old young?? I've keep having tots of giving up the whole savings thing all together and leave everything to fate and destiny but just feel it's not right lor. so wat to do? just have to clench my teeth and trudge on...
Really very disheartening to see that ur love 1s spending their $$ away when u're trying to hard to save, especially so for me bcos i am not working so i can only save very little so after a lot of effot the amt only increase by a little...so sianz...
The reason i say put the $$ for the car insurance in another place is that I wan to try not to withdraw any $$ from our UOB acct. cos I'm afraid it'll bcome a habit, whenever have problems then think of $$ frm there.
Problems dun solve by themselves just like knots, u dun untie them the knor till just remain there.
Problems will only decrease when u solve them 1 by 1 if u just leave it there other problems will of cos add up. Simple theory right? To solve them u just have to b firm, once u've decided on wat to do just go and execute. U may hav a grand plan but if u dun execute it it'll just b a plan.Have some principles, dun sway from ur intended path.
The reason i 'encourage' her to buy her car is to let her learn how to save. Frankly speaking her family dosen't have a good saving culture, They'll just spend and think later. So when there's some situation that requires $$, they'll just go 'borrow(or rather extort)' $$ from my dd which i feel is very wrong lor... I wan my dd to learn the virtues of saving. I never expect her to be as frugal as me(I spend only abt $200 a month),i've been taught since young to save $$.For my brothers and I, usually we'll only spend 1/2 of our pocket $$ and save the rest..but it's not for their case.
when they wan something then they start saving for it else they just spend everything.
Frankly I'm unhappy because my dd isn't firm enough to stick to wat she has said or agreed. When her ... wants $$, even though she has made up her mind not to give any more $$ for the month she'll still give. She's just too soft hearted. And she said her dad trying to shelter them and not make them lose face or watever. To me, their lifestyle is simply too extravagant. If not so well off then live a not-so-well-off life lah. No need for top of the range audio sys, BIG TV, fastest computer,NEWEST MP3 etc... I'm still living w/o air conditioning u noe and I'm quite satisfied.
Like her dad, i'm also trying to protect her, but not frm outsiders but frm her own family. I feel that they are treating her like a $$ tree. She must noe how to stand up for herself, have her own principles, NO means NO. YES means YES. Simple as tat. I don't want to see the scenerio whereby her car gets tow away for a few months stay at Maybank's car pound or that her life is so miserable bcos of the car. her salary is definitely enough to support a OPC but she has no xtra $$ to give to her parents for NEW gadgets. That's why I wan her to protect herself...If come to the point whereby i've have to stand up for her that would be disasterous, I dun wan to sour relationship between me and her parents that would put her in a tight spot i noe.
I know she didn't anyhow spend her $$ but if she gave the $$ she saved up to her parents for her bro's hi-tech gadgets that wat's the pt? It'll still come one full circle to sq 1.
I never expect her to return the $2k I gave for the downpayment and I never expected her to contribute any $$ for our future marriage purpose athough I hope that she'll be able to contribute some. All this while i've been trying to save as much as possible. I'm very tired also u noe, everyday lunchtime look for the cheapest food possible, control myself not to buy some things that I wish I could have,how to save more $$. Imagine if I am like her, dun have the habit of saving and dun even think of marriage at all then wat will happen mabbe the whole marriage thing will only b a dream. cos even 5-6 years down the rd we'll still b penniless. Is that the ideal situation. I dun understand why my dd keep thinking that my plan to marry at 28 is termed 'marry early' is 28++ yrs old young?? I've keep having tots of giving up the whole savings thing all together and leave everything to fate and destiny but just feel it's not right lor. so wat to do? just have to clench my teeth and trudge on...
Really very disheartening to see that ur love 1s spending their $$ away when u're trying to hard to save, especially so for me bcos i am not working so i can only save very little so after a lot of effot the amt only increase by a little...so sianz...
The reason i say put the $$ for the car insurance in another place is that I wan to try not to withdraw any $$ from our UOB acct. cos I'm afraid it'll bcome a habit, whenever have problems then think of $$ frm there.
Problems dun solve by themselves just like knots, u dun untie them the knor till just remain there.
Problems will only decrease when u solve them 1 by 1 if u just leave it there other problems will of cos add up. Simple theory right? To solve them u just have to b firm, once u've decided on wat to do just go and execute. U may hav a grand plan but if u dun execute it it'll just b a plan.Have some principles, dun sway from ur intended path.
Sunday, February 27, 2005
My Birthday
Friday 25th Feb was my birthday, *sigh* so sad this year no presents...My mum gave me $12 ang pow and my dad gave me $20, my bro brought a slice of cake for me and my dd bought me a muffin to celebrate..that's about all. Mabbe will buy myself a small present to remember the day I turned 25...Happy Birthday to Me
DD's car car
Haha everything has been confirmed, dd's car car will be arriving mabbe in April or May when the next shipment of kia picanto arrives in singapore...before the booking of the car, honestly I feel very excited and very enthusiatic abt the whole thing but now after everything's been confirmed, strangely the feeling sort of died down. Before the car booking, I did a very deep analysis of the whole situation, whether the buying of car would be beneficial to us, our marriage arrangements etc... To many people, i guess the better way would be to save up the $$, purchase a hse then buy a car, that's wat i feel in the 1st place... to many people I think that would be a wiser choice also..Well I knew that buying a car would deprive us of much needed cash for our hse and marriage and mabbe set us back for a couple of years cos we have to save up $$ for everything, hse, bills etc...Marriage in Singapore isn't cheap. Anyway I think for our case it doesn't make much difference whether we buy house or car 1st..cos I guess most of the $$ for marriage would be my own burden.My dd dosen't really save much and i guess she would be happier if I let her buy her car car so that we 2 can go whizzing away during weekends...Many people around her have also given her advice to save the $$ to buy a hse 1st before buying a car and I guess these advices does have a effect on her but I've already told her b4 if she thinks it's ok then just go ahead...My worries is actually if she dun buy now when car prices are rock bottom then mabbe car prices will increase and she will not be able to afford...*sigh* I guess everything would have to leave it to our own fate...and in the meantime i will try to save $$, as much as possible so that we can get married as soon as possible...Now looking forward to "decorating" the car hehe
Saturday, February 19, 2005
carcar
Well my dd(and I) have decided to book a "off peak" Kia Picanto well if u are wondering wat is a "picanto" it's a CAR! haha you readers out there must be wondering why suddenly I got a 360 degrees about turn if u've been reading my earlier blogs..I've been stanchly oppose to buying a car and rather save the $$ for marriage wif my baobei dd.. Well i've not given up the idea of marrying as yet..I will continue to strive to save enough for marriage hopefully we can complete tat dream of mine at 28++ haha..really wish to take my dd's hand and walk down the aistle together...hmmm Ok i am digressing abit here...Ok we've decided to book a car so that the car would be our 2nd thing we have together actually it's her idea to buy , I have no driving license by the way haha but nvm I guess it would be a better for her to get the thing she wanted badly cos anyway she've been out of her PT studies for about 6 months now, but still her savings is not moving dunno what she spent her $$ on anyway so I guess it would be really difficult for her to save and much easier for her to spend..Well to spend on something that we can see and touch and use is much better than spending stuffs which she can't even see..like from july last year till now her savings still haven't gone out despite the fact that she's thrown away her study burden...and I dun see her buying any stuffs either...so i guess let her buy her carcar and at least she can get something she wanted badly...Anyway if she's happy I'm happy also haha...Well hope that we will be successful in getting the car at the price we wan and hopefull the COE dosen't shoot up too much until we have to drop the whole plan...Pray pray...Let the carcar be another milestone in DD's tale..! hurray!
Saturday, February 12, 2005
Ubi Car Showroom Trip
Today my dd(dd=gf) and I went to Ubi, you must be wondering what on earth are we doing there, Ubi is a ulu industrial estate in the east side of the island...and somemore we were there on a sat. haha we actually went to visit the car showrooms there for perodua (m'sia car maker), well my dd was thinking of getting a OPC just to drive around during and to ferry her dog around after work and during the weekends. Well I think you would agree with me that most couples who went to car showrooms are mainly husband and wife , I think we are behaving more like husband and wife now even though we are still officially classified as "single" in the government's register.. Haha We went to look at the perodua Kelisa and the Kia picanto(encouraged by the kelisa salesman). Basically both are small cars low fuel consumption and good for budget conscious ppl like my dd lor. After all we still need to save $$ for our marriage in the future mah so no point getting a too expensive car... Ok to compare kelisa is a smaller car, less room, less "cc" but the insurance is cheaper. The Kia Picanto is slightly bigger,(looks better also),the interior is more spacious, but the insurance is more expensive (and have more colors also). I think my dd like the picanto better although the kelisa is stronger recommended by her uncles. However since the pricing for both cars are about the same(say for the insurance) I think she might as well buy the car she feels more comfortable with, the one she likes better rather than she buy the kelisa already then lament on whether she would be better off is she bought the picanto right? afterall she does like the picanto better and I think it's better lor cos it's roomier and I think I'm more comfortable with it.Cos although it's a small cc car it doesn't look as pint-size as that kelisa + that kelisa with all the "freebies(sports rim, chrome look dashboard)" thrown in made it look like a ah beng car...Think we don't look like ah bengs hor? But ultimately the decision lies with her if she picks kelisa in the end then ok lor it's not too bad also..but i feel that when we buy things it's better to buy something that we like more right? somemore the pricing is roughly about the same...
picanto
picanto
kelisa
well mabbe many of u upon reading this will think that she is very extravagant and she should save the $$ for marriage 1st rather than buy a car at this time. I think many people would think this way, in fact I also feel this way too. But I must stress ed that this is only my personal view, I cannot expect everyone to think and feel like me right? I understand my dd (after 5 years of bf-gf relationship), she is the sort who always like to proof that she's better than others it's just her nature . I think that after 5 years of working, all she wans is a "trophy" to show that all her 5 years of slogging have bore a "fruit", that's her carcar. so I can understand why she wants to own a car so badly. wat's more, she has been used to being ferried around when she's young9by her dad) now that she's to take her own transport, naturally there will be a voidness in her all the more she will yearn for a car. I think we can afford a OPC for the time being lah...Actually I tried to dissuade her from buying a car and save for marriage 1st but now upon pondering I kinda changed my stand cos I noe that even if she dun buy car, she won't be able to save much also cos of her spending habits, she likes to buy jewelleries, stuffs for her dogs, etc...and when she don't buy anything, her family would ocasionally borrow(but no return) $$ from her and to fund her brother's high end electronic gadgets. I was hoping that she can used the car ownership to start learning how to save $$. Cos she has to plan for the car and her own living expenses so that at least she can learn how to save $$ and correct her extravangant way of life. Wat's more when she got little money in her hand she can't lend any to her family right? so in a way this will also help curb her family's extravagant spending habits as well. So at least if she buys her carcar which is something she wan rather than she spends her $$ on other things that she can't even see at all. Hopefully she can achieve her goal of owning a car, I must help her to save to make her dream a reality...
Think only then can she concentrate on saving for marriage although she won't be able to save much but as long as she tries I am more than contented..
+
+
=dd's happy family!
Sunday, January 30, 2005
******SiGhZzzz******
Suddenly filled with lotsa "emotions", I dun noe why but sometimes I will have certain "unexplained" feelings about life(gan chu) that just come and go...
Very often Life is fraught with difficulties, we have many things that we wan to achieve but there are always obstacles. Most of the time, we encounter some conflicts in ideas, and often we seek a compromise. Sometimes we win, sometimes we lose. I dunno why I suddenly have this "lost" feeling. Why u ask me? I also dunno why just have this feeling of helplessness.
Case 1: My family have 6 members, there are 4 brothers in the family, now is the new year, thus everyone have to start cleaning up in preparation for the new year, but it seems that I am the only 1 doing it together with my mum, Well I can jolly well leave the whole thing to my mum to clean but then it's hard work climbing up and down thus someone have to help and when I help the others just watch. I just dunno why they are just so damn L..A..Z..Y. My 3rd bro is in NS BMT, I have already cleaned up the whole room, only left his wardrobe and bookshelves for him to clean ok I can understand, he just came back from army training(and sick somemore) which is suppose to be "siong". so I didn't expect him to help much just to clean and tidy up his own stuffs Is that too much to ask? I let him rest on Sat night then ask him politely to clean and tidy up his stuffs on sun morn I think this shouldn't take him more than an hour...but the moment he opened his eyes, his buttocks was glued to the chair and his eyes to the computer monitor. THen before I went out I reminded him again to tidy up and he said "Ok Ok" then I left the house but when I came back everything was still untouched..nothing was done! Urgh...We all stay in the same house so it's EVERYONE's RESPONSIBLITY to help clean up the house right? Just becos I help my mum in spring cleaning almost every year, all of them now assume that it's my job to do the cleaning, and if I didn't do it for 1 year, my dad would jumped(and nag/scold ) at me but not those whom never contribute anything over these years.Then my parents just because I am an early riser, I have to buy breakfast for my family every Sun(well almost) Well I don't mind that actually if everyone takes turns.I don't mind if I am get more of this "duty" as long as every1 else also go down sometimes, now it seems that waking up early is a bad thing. Then I remember previously I used to run most of the errands for my mum just because when my mum calls the others, they would flare up easily and started shouting, Then for this case it seems that my good temper is being taken advantage of. I don't like this feeling at all ...I don't wan to take advantage of others and similarly I don't want others to take advantage of me. And I like to buy things back to snack, eat ...Frankly speaking I dun mind sharing with my bros but it seems that this "sharing" is always I am the "giver" and never the "reciever". I don't feel good about this. Suddenly when I think of it I feel that being too mild tempered,waking up early ,sympathetic and responsible will let others take advantage of u? even ur own family members? Suddenly I feel like shouting out to each and every1 of them, "I DON'T MIND SHARING AS LONG AS I CAN BE THE RECIEVER SOMETIMES!" sometimes I am very tired of all this I am really tired...So FED UP..Urgh... Sometimes I feel tat is it becos I am too good, and I dun easily flare up that's why everyone's trying to take advantage of me? Now I buy things I eat alone I don't like to share anymore...cos it's pointless I am always the 1 buying they just noe how to pinch my stuffs to eat...they never contribute at all...
I don't know, now I am trying my hardest to save every penny I have, move out, marry my dd(hopefully she agree) but with my meagre attachment pay the more I think of how much I can save(only),many things I wish to buy now can only stay in my wishlist for the time being... I feel even more helpless...*sighzZzzz* Now all I can do is carry on hoping.......
Very often Life is fraught with difficulties, we have many things that we wan to achieve but there are always obstacles. Most of the time, we encounter some conflicts in ideas, and often we seek a compromise. Sometimes we win, sometimes we lose. I dunno why I suddenly have this "lost" feeling. Why u ask me? I also dunno why just have this feeling of helplessness.
Case 1: My family have 6 members, there are 4 brothers in the family, now is the new year, thus everyone have to start cleaning up in preparation for the new year, but it seems that I am the only 1 doing it together with my mum, Well I can jolly well leave the whole thing to my mum to clean but then it's hard work climbing up and down thus someone have to help and when I help the others just watch. I just dunno why they are just so damn L..A..Z..Y. My 3rd bro is in NS BMT, I have already cleaned up the whole room, only left his wardrobe and bookshelves for him to clean ok I can understand, he just came back from army training(and sick somemore) which is suppose to be "siong". so I didn't expect him to help much just to clean and tidy up his own stuffs Is that too much to ask? I let him rest on Sat night then ask him politely to clean and tidy up his stuffs on sun morn I think this shouldn't take him more than an hour...but the moment he opened his eyes, his buttocks was glued to the chair and his eyes to the computer monitor. THen before I went out I reminded him again to tidy up and he said "Ok Ok" then I left the house but when I came back everything was still untouched..nothing was done! Urgh...We all stay in the same house so it's EVERYONE's RESPONSIBLITY to help clean up the house right? Just becos I help my mum in spring cleaning almost every year, all of them now assume that it's my job to do the cleaning, and if I didn't do it for 1 year, my dad would jumped(and nag/scold ) at me but not those whom never contribute anything over these years.Then my parents just because I am an early riser, I have to buy breakfast for my family every Sun(well almost) Well I don't mind that actually if everyone takes turns.I don't mind if I am get more of this "duty" as long as every1 else also go down sometimes, now it seems that waking up early is a bad thing. Then I remember previously I used to run most of the errands for my mum just because when my mum calls the others, they would flare up easily and started shouting, Then for this case it seems that my good temper is being taken advantage of. I don't like this feeling at all ...I don't wan to take advantage of others and similarly I don't want others to take advantage of me. And I like to buy things back to snack, eat ...Frankly speaking I dun mind sharing with my bros but it seems that this "sharing" is always I am the "giver" and never the "reciever". I don't feel good about this. Suddenly when I think of it I feel that being too mild tempered,waking up early ,sympathetic and responsible will let others take advantage of u? even ur own family members? Suddenly I feel like shouting out to each and every1 of them, "I DON'T MIND SHARING AS LONG AS I CAN BE THE RECIEVER SOMETIMES!" sometimes I am very tired of all this I am really tired...So FED UP..Urgh... Sometimes I feel tat is it becos I am too good, and I dun easily flare up that's why everyone's trying to take advantage of me? Now I buy things I eat alone I don't like to share anymore...cos it's pointless I am always the 1 buying they just noe how to pinch my stuffs to eat...they never contribute at all...
I don't know, now I am trying my hardest to save every penny I have, move out, marry my dd(hopefully she agree) but with my meagre attachment pay the more I think of how much I can save(only),many things I wish to buy now can only stay in my wishlist for the time being... I feel even more helpless...*sighzZzzz* Now all I can do is carry on hoping.......
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
Reply to earlier comment by Haz...Hahaha
Hahaha I actually didn't notice that there's a comment on my blog for the blog I've Created on the 3rd of Oct..Although that matter had blown over(as always). But still felt a urge to reply haha...Pls be reminded haz that I am not trying to spark of another round of argument with you here just trying to reply that's all...
first of all I'll like to take u for that fantastic nick' u've given me "Mr Clear Headed" although I sense some scarasm in the wordings but I think I'll just take that as a compliment..haha
Of course I know that my gf's mouse is a super-duper machine gun that can sputter non-stop (and anything can come out from that mouth) when's she's angry. I don't know whether u've seen/heard it before but I do have the pleasure to experience it 1st hand. I guess in that situation U've just hav to stay away from her in case u r gunned down by her. Anyway the reason I've written the blog on this is also precisely the reason. That day she's angry and I can't tell her off immediately else it will just make her madder.So I guess the most effective way is not to keep quiet but to voice out to her when she's more settled(blown over her top), I knew that she'll read my blog that's why I chose to post it here so that at least she can be aware of how I feel. If I don't feedback, relationships can't improve right?
Ok now let's get things straight, I totally agree with ur idea on "GOALS" and getting married at 28(hopefully) and getting a house is just my goal, just a aim. there's no MUST in it cos it's just my personal goal just like getting a car is her goal. If by then I still can't achieve it than so be it. I wun forcefully insist on getting my way I think my gf is well aware of this.And I never really forbid my gf from getting a car.it's just that I feel that there's no need for a car now that's why I advise her against it.I think she misunderstood that as a "forbid". anyway if she insist there's nothing I can do right?
Haha, Yes u r right, having a house need a hell lot of CASH. I've taken that into account,that's why I've been trying to save as much as I can from now in preparation for that day.As I've said earlier buying a hse is only my goal, it gives me the motivation to save $$ else if I dun have that in mind, every now and then whenever I feel like buying some stuffs that I wan, I just go ahead and buy it, wun I be left with less in the end? wun I be drifting further and further away? Frankly speaking I also feel that ir's not really that feasible to be married at 28 in Singapore, I know that too but if I have that goal in mind at least even if I don't achieve it, I shouldn't be too far off right?
Anyway I just told her that that's my goal, I've never really want to force her into it if she don't want. So there's really nothing to talk about "taking and giving" here. If I can't save enough by then then just delay the whole thing, to be u either do it good or u don't do it at all, I think we are not those despos who wan to rush into marriage just because we wan to...haha
Ah Hem, Miss Haz a car is INDEED classified as a WANT, NOT a need I think u can find it in any psychological book. This is especially so in Singapore. I think I don't need to explain the meaning of Wants and Needs to you right? I am sure everyone has a copy of the "little Oxford's Dictionary". or u can find out the meaing from typing "wants and needs" from any internet search engine. Mabbe you would also like to search for "Maslow's Hierachy of Needs" then u will get my pt.
Last but not least I hav to emphasize this again. I don't mean that I MUST have a house, MUST get married etc.. by the age of 28. and I DEFINITELY did not forbid my gf to buy a car only trying to advise her. Mabbe my tone is wrong, but that's entirely my meaning. If we could only get married in our 30s or worse still 40s then so be it as long as when we are old and grey, the walking sticks we have is each other. That's all that matters.
Once last thing, it's also true that every guy want her love to understand them also.
first of all I'll like to take u for that fantastic nick' u've given me "Mr Clear Headed" although I sense some scarasm in the wordings but I think I'll just take that as a compliment..haha
Of course I know that my gf's mouse is a super-duper machine gun that can sputter non-stop (and anything can come out from that mouth) when's she's angry. I don't know whether u've seen/heard it before but I do have the pleasure to experience it 1st hand. I guess in that situation U've just hav to stay away from her in case u r gunned down by her. Anyway the reason I've written the blog on this is also precisely the reason. That day she's angry and I can't tell her off immediately else it will just make her madder.So I guess the most effective way is not to keep quiet but to voice out to her when she's more settled(blown over her top), I knew that she'll read my blog that's why I chose to post it here so that at least she can be aware of how I feel. If I don't feedback, relationships can't improve right?
Ok now let's get things straight, I totally agree with ur idea on "GOALS" and getting married at 28(hopefully) and getting a house is just my goal, just a aim. there's no MUST in it cos it's just my personal goal just like getting a car is her goal. If by then I still can't achieve it than so be it. I wun forcefully insist on getting my way I think my gf is well aware of this.And I never really forbid my gf from getting a car.it's just that I feel that there's no need for a car now that's why I advise her against it.I think she misunderstood that as a "forbid". anyway if she insist there's nothing I can do right?
Haha, Yes u r right, having a house need a hell lot of CASH. I've taken that into account,that's why I've been trying to save as much as I can from now in preparation for that day.As I've said earlier buying a hse is only my goal, it gives me the motivation to save $$ else if I dun have that in mind, every now and then whenever I feel like buying some stuffs that I wan, I just go ahead and buy it, wun I be left with less in the end? wun I be drifting further and further away? Frankly speaking I also feel that ir's not really that feasible to be married at 28 in Singapore, I know that too but if I have that goal in mind at least even if I don't achieve it, I shouldn't be too far off right?
Anyway I just told her that that's my goal, I've never really want to force her into it if she don't want. So there's really nothing to talk about "taking and giving" here. If I can't save enough by then then just delay the whole thing, to be u either do it good or u don't do it at all, I think we are not those despos who wan to rush into marriage just because we wan to...haha
Ah Hem, Miss Haz a car is INDEED classified as a WANT, NOT a need I think u can find it in any psychological book. This is especially so in Singapore. I think I don't need to explain the meaning of Wants and Needs to you right? I am sure everyone has a copy of the "little Oxford's Dictionary". or u can find out the meaing from typing "wants and needs" from any internet search engine. Mabbe you would also like to search for "Maslow's Hierachy of Needs" then u will get my pt.
Last but not least I hav to emphasize this again. I don't mean that I MUST have a house, MUST get married etc.. by the age of 28. and I DEFINITELY did not forbid my gf to buy a car only trying to advise her. Mabbe my tone is wrong, but that's entirely my meaning. If we could only get married in our 30s or worse still 40s then so be it as long as when we are old and grey, the walking sticks we have is each other. That's all that matters.
Once last thing, it's also true that every guy want her love to understand them also.
Comments from a bystander...
At 12:24 PM, haz said...
Hi,
That's something nice of you in saying what you posted in the beginning of this post... i'm sure ur gf, well i know ur gf is touched by how you feel towards her.
You seem to project yourself as a clear minded person, so i'll take ur word for it (since all i know of you is what i read from this blog, and from ur gf). So Mr. clear minded, be clear of one thing, don't ever take what a person said seriously during an argument. This is especially the case when it comes to your gf... weren't you the one who mentioned she's the emotional sort? (you should know her better than i do) Bad, unintentional, regretful things are said in arguments, we all know that, but when it comes the time, we all know just as well how difficult it is to control what comes blabbing out of our mouth. If an argument with some not-so-nice things are being said of you, and ur life crumbles just coz of that, then god bless you. My point is, don't be silly to ponder over the 'mean' things that were said in an argument... ur gf is regretful of what was said of you ...
Wow, so you've been "very clear abt what you want"... congrats. Oh so you've decided that getting a house is much more of an importance than ur gf's wish for a car, okay let's put this aside first...
Have you ever really asked for her opinions in going by YOUR plan of getting married with her when you both reach the age of 28? If yes, have you seriously considered if it is financially feasible in doing so? If you are tellin me "yes" again, then Mr clear headed, you're not so clear minded after all. What ppl do thesedays is that the very first thing they need in getting a house is having their CPF packed with $. People don't go around paying cash, other than the montly installments, for the initial payment. Oh so, what about the renovations right? If a simple house is what you really asked for, then renovations won't be much of a problem.. well unless you're asking for much more in one go, which you both could very well have "upgrade" or build on along your marriage life..
Argh, enough of the $ part... like the saying goes... "tan $ shan he chi" -- pardon my han yu ping ying.
So what you want is getting married at the age of 28,
what you want is (naturally) gettin a house by then,
what you want is for ur gf to help save up $ with you for the house.
And i've to agree with you on your wants since they sounded logical enough...
But, is she prepared for your 'wants'?
She is going along with your want to get married at that age, even though she personally feels you both wouldn't be financially stable at that time. And with that, she'd naturally have to go along with ur other plans since they're all tied together...
Hmm..Let's see.. who's the one giving... who's the one taking?
i don't want to really comment on her wish of getting a car.. by just want to say something based on my understanding... that her wish for a vehicle may seem somewhat an unnecessary luxury need to most... but think about the direct and indirect reasons behind it. Everyone has their goals, owning a car happens to be hers. It's just that the $ involved will get everyone to think it's more of a want than a need. Have you notice me saying it's her "wish"? Perhaps it's more of a goal that she tries to achieve... it's always good to have a goal in life, achieveable or not.
I don't think you'd want a girl friend who doesn't have a mind and hence, goals of her own... if you do, you might as well marry a _____ (fill in the blank).. if not, do expect conflicting interests, we r all individuals with different mindsets
i'm not saying your wish for a house before a car is wrong.. there's always reasons behind every decision/goal made, which you'd have to stop and think about it... (remember there are things in life that r personal fulfilments that we all hope to achieve before being tied down...) Ask yourself questions.. are you rushing things? is both party mentally and financially stable enough to step over to the next phrase of ur life?
One thing for sure, your gf's love for you isn't any lesser coz of these.. plus it hurts her just as much as you when you both argue... but i'm sure she loves you just as much as you loves her. this is what's important
Perhaps all a woman wants is for the man to understand what she feels~
All the best to you two :)
(sorry about my blah.. it's late and my mind's goin royak)
Hi,
That's something nice of you in saying what you posted in the beginning of this post... i'm sure ur gf, well i know ur gf is touched by how you feel towards her.
You seem to project yourself as a clear minded person, so i'll take ur word for it (since all i know of you is what i read from this blog, and from ur gf). So Mr. clear minded, be clear of one thing, don't ever take what a person said seriously during an argument. This is especially the case when it comes to your gf... weren't you the one who mentioned she's the emotional sort? (you should know her better than i do) Bad, unintentional, regretful things are said in arguments, we all know that, but when it comes the time, we all know just as well how difficult it is to control what comes blabbing out of our mouth. If an argument with some not-so-nice things are being said of you, and ur life crumbles just coz of that, then god bless you. My point is, don't be silly to ponder over the 'mean' things that were said in an argument... ur gf is regretful of what was said of you ...
Wow, so you've been "very clear abt what you want"... congrats. Oh so you've decided that getting a house is much more of an importance than ur gf's wish for a car, okay let's put this aside first...
Have you ever really asked for her opinions in going by YOUR plan of getting married with her when you both reach the age of 28? If yes, have you seriously considered if it is financially feasible in doing so? If you are tellin me "yes" again, then Mr clear headed, you're not so clear minded after all. What ppl do thesedays is that the very first thing they need in getting a house is having their CPF packed with $. People don't go around paying cash, other than the montly installments, for the initial payment. Oh so, what about the renovations right? If a simple house is what you really asked for, then renovations won't be much of a problem.. well unless you're asking for much more in one go, which you both could very well have "upgrade" or build on along your marriage life..
Argh, enough of the $ part... like the saying goes... "tan $ shan he chi" -- pardon my han yu ping ying.
So what you want is getting married at the age of 28,
what you want is (naturally) gettin a house by then,
what you want is for ur gf to help save up $ with you for the house.
And i've to agree with you on your wants since they sounded logical enough...
But, is she prepared for your 'wants'?
She is going along with your want to get married at that age, even though she personally feels you both wouldn't be financially stable at that time. And with that, she'd naturally have to go along with ur other plans since they're all tied together...
Hmm..Let's see.. who's the one giving... who's the one taking?
i don't want to really comment on her wish of getting a car.. by just want to say something based on my understanding... that her wish for a vehicle may seem somewhat an unnecessary luxury need to most... but think about the direct and indirect reasons behind it. Everyone has their goals, owning a car happens to be hers. It's just that the $ involved will get everyone to think it's more of a want than a need. Have you notice me saying it's her "wish"? Perhaps it's more of a goal that she tries to achieve... it's always good to have a goal in life, achieveable or not.
I don't think you'd want a girl friend who doesn't have a mind and hence, goals of her own... if you do, you might as well marry a _____ (fill in the blank).. if not, do expect conflicting interests, we r all individuals with different mindsets
i'm not saying your wish for a house before a car is wrong.. there's always reasons behind every decision/goal made, which you'd have to stop and think about it... (remember there are things in life that r personal fulfilments that we all hope to achieve before being tied down...) Ask yourself questions.. are you rushing things? is both party mentally and financially stable enough to step over to the next phrase of ur life?
One thing for sure, your gf's love for you isn't any lesser coz of these.. plus it hurts her just as much as you when you both argue... but i'm sure she loves you just as much as you loves her. this is what's important
Perhaps all a woman wants is for the man to understand what she feels~
All the best to you two :)
(sorry about my blah.. it's late and my mind's goin royak)
Sunday, January 23, 2005
Article From Straits Times
Found this article from the straits times dated 23 Jan 05, Quite meaningful read on...
Young, Single & Bankrupt
Old enough to drive, not savvy enough to stop splurging, they're a card away from financial ruin
By Leong Chan Teik
INCREASINGLY, young adults are joining Generation D - that is, Generation Debt.
The Official Assignee (OA), which administers the estates of bankrupts, says the number of undischarged bankrupts aged 30 or below jumped from 785 in 2001 to 1,375 last year.
Among them is former civil servant Patrick (not his real name) who was bankrupt two years ago at 27, with $33,000 in credit card debts. His marriage broke up soon after.
'When the couple came to me, they were blaming each other for their money woes. He said: 'She knows the high life as much as I do',' says lawyer Lim Choi Ming.
Patrick and his wife had frequently wined and dined at expensive restaurants, and bought a car and expensive goods - including a refrigerator that, amazingly, cost $2,000 - for their lavishly renovated flat. Trouble was, it was all on credit.
'I was taken aback. They were very young and shouldn't have had all that debt, but they did,' says Ms Lim.
The OA says 67 per cent of non-business related bankrupt- cies, regardless of age, arise from excessive use of credit.
Credit is expensive - charged at interest rates of up to 24 per cent a year - but many overlook that in their quest for pleasure and to keep up appearances.
The Credit Bureau says only 21 per cent of credit card holders aged between 21 and 29 did not 'revolve' at all from July 2003 to June 2004. In other words, only 21 per cent had a clean record of paying up in full every month.
It says rollover debt for this age group hit $205 million last November, or 8 per cent of Singapore's $2.6 billion card debt - the latter being a record high.
Those belonging to Generation D expect to live well as soon as they leave school - even if their income does not match their dream lifestyle.
'It's very common for young people to start going on overseas holidays before they even have a job,' says 24-year-old Sylvia Mun, a financial planner at Manulife Financial.
And when they start work and can no longer expect their parents to pick up the tab, they fall for credit card schemes that entice them to holiday first and pay back over, say, 12 months.
Cars are a particular weak- ness for young men.
Says Ms Mun: 'I know of guys who earn $1,600 a month who will buy a car - cheaper brands that cost $600 to $700 in monthly instalments. Petrol and other running expenses cost another few hundred dollars.
'Usually, they feel they need a car to attract a girlfriend. Or they see a friend buying a car and they want one too.'
Mr Kuo How Nam, the president of Credit Counselling Singapore (CCS), a non-profit organisation that helps people resolve their debts, says: 'We have had many cases of young adults who were intoxicated by their new-found earning ability and went on a spending spree.
'Very often, there is a disconnect between what they think they deserve and the income necessary to sustain this lifestyle. The gap is met using easy credit.'
Thus, among those who have not sunk into bankruptcy, many have spending habits and moun- ting debts that are putting them on the slippery slope towards it.
Take administrative assistant John, 27, who applied for five credit cards in one year, spent his nights at karaoke lounges, and bought nice clothes and a fancier hi-fi system for his car.
A friend cheated him too, he says, and now, his debts total $40,000. A bank referred him to CCS, which helped him devise a repayment plan. Three banks have agreed to it, but two others haven't yet.
He says: 'I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I can avoid bankruptcy. It's a horrible thing to happen when I'm in my 20s.'
If all the banks agree to spare him, the mandated road to recovery will still be gruelling: Over the next few years, he will have to curtail his spending, repay his debt in instalments, and live without a credit card.
Too many temptations
ASSOCIATE Professor Tan Soo Jiuan of the National University of Singapore's Department of Marketing points out two recent trends that undermine any inclination young adults may have to save their hard-earned money.
First, they are bombarded by a proliferation of alluring IT gadgets and so-called lifestyle products and services. 'These are hyped up in the mass media as a status symbol. Handphones are the No. 1 culprit,' she says.
Second, credit pushers are aggressively targeting young adults. 'That leads to many temptations for those below 30, who are still struggling to establish themselves. They are particularly vulnerable because of poor personal discipline and financial prudence,' she adds.
The Credit Bureau says people in the 20-29 age group have on average 3.4 cards - a figure which is higher than, or equal to, that for other age groups except 30-34, whose figure is 3.6.
But averages mask what is happening in certain circles. Ms Josephine Koh, 27, the finance manager of a firm selling skincare products, says: 'Among my friends, it's common to have at least half a dozen credit cards and as many as 10.'
Some, but not all, people can handle the easy credit. Says Ms Koh: 'We are sensible. We don't spend to the limit, and we know that the interest rate is not low.'
Education is key to reining in overspending among the young, say some observers. Schools and parents need to teach the young Personal Finance 101. If nothing else, parents should not be present a sad example themselves.
'If parents are excessive spenders, they set a bad example for their children,' says Mr Vincent Chen, 56, a father of two sons aged 27 and 29, and a committee chairman of the Securities Investors Association of Singapore. 'I don't think there's a difference between a $150 shirt and a $10 one. I'm glad my sons are sensible about money too.'
If the ranks of Generation D are growing in Singapore, the rate is even faster in some developed countries. In Singapore, 6.4 per cent of undischarged bankrupts were aged 30 or below as at the end of last year.
In Australia, of the 22,639 people going into bankruptcy in 2002 to 2003, 9 per cent were under 25. In the United States, about 120,000 people aged 25 or under filed for bankruptcy in 2000, up from 80,000 in 1991.
Naivete about money has cost them dearly - all for a few fleeting moments of the high life.
Young, Single & Bankrupt
Old enough to drive, not savvy enough to stop splurging, they're a card away from financial ruin
By Leong Chan Teik
INCREASINGLY, young adults are joining Generation D - that is, Generation Debt.
The Official Assignee (OA), which administers the estates of bankrupts, says the number of undischarged bankrupts aged 30 or below jumped from 785 in 2001 to 1,375 last year.
Among them is former civil servant Patrick (not his real name) who was bankrupt two years ago at 27, with $33,000 in credit card debts. His marriage broke up soon after.
'When the couple came to me, they were blaming each other for their money woes. He said: 'She knows the high life as much as I do',' says lawyer Lim Choi Ming.
Patrick and his wife had frequently wined and dined at expensive restaurants, and bought a car and expensive goods - including a refrigerator that, amazingly, cost $2,000 - for their lavishly renovated flat. Trouble was, it was all on credit.
'I was taken aback. They were very young and shouldn't have had all that debt, but they did,' says Ms Lim.
The OA says 67 per cent of non-business related bankrupt- cies, regardless of age, arise from excessive use of credit.
Credit is expensive - charged at interest rates of up to 24 per cent a year - but many overlook that in their quest for pleasure and to keep up appearances.
The Credit Bureau says only 21 per cent of credit card holders aged between 21 and 29 did not 'revolve' at all from July 2003 to June 2004. In other words, only 21 per cent had a clean record of paying up in full every month.
It says rollover debt for this age group hit $205 million last November, or 8 per cent of Singapore's $2.6 billion card debt - the latter being a record high.
Those belonging to Generation D expect to live well as soon as they leave school - even if their income does not match their dream lifestyle.
'It's very common for young people to start going on overseas holidays before they even have a job,' says 24-year-old Sylvia Mun, a financial planner at Manulife Financial.
And when they start work and can no longer expect their parents to pick up the tab, they fall for credit card schemes that entice them to holiday first and pay back over, say, 12 months.
Cars are a particular weak- ness for young men.
Says Ms Mun: 'I know of guys who earn $1,600 a month who will buy a car - cheaper brands that cost $600 to $700 in monthly instalments. Petrol and other running expenses cost another few hundred dollars.
'Usually, they feel they need a car to attract a girlfriend. Or they see a friend buying a car and they want one too.'
Mr Kuo How Nam, the president of Credit Counselling Singapore (CCS), a non-profit organisation that helps people resolve their debts, says: 'We have had many cases of young adults who were intoxicated by their new-found earning ability and went on a spending spree.
'Very often, there is a disconnect between what they think they deserve and the income necessary to sustain this lifestyle. The gap is met using easy credit.'
Thus, among those who have not sunk into bankruptcy, many have spending habits and moun- ting debts that are putting them on the slippery slope towards it.
Take administrative assistant John, 27, who applied for five credit cards in one year, spent his nights at karaoke lounges, and bought nice clothes and a fancier hi-fi system for his car.
A friend cheated him too, he says, and now, his debts total $40,000. A bank referred him to CCS, which helped him devise a repayment plan. Three banks have agreed to it, but two others haven't yet.
He says: 'I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I can avoid bankruptcy. It's a horrible thing to happen when I'm in my 20s.'
If all the banks agree to spare him, the mandated road to recovery will still be gruelling: Over the next few years, he will have to curtail his spending, repay his debt in instalments, and live without a credit card.
Too many temptations
ASSOCIATE Professor Tan Soo Jiuan of the National University of Singapore's Department of Marketing points out two recent trends that undermine any inclination young adults may have to save their hard-earned money.
First, they are bombarded by a proliferation of alluring IT gadgets and so-called lifestyle products and services. 'These are hyped up in the mass media as a status symbol. Handphones are the No. 1 culprit,' she says.
Second, credit pushers are aggressively targeting young adults. 'That leads to many temptations for those below 30, who are still struggling to establish themselves. They are particularly vulnerable because of poor personal discipline and financial prudence,' she adds.
The Credit Bureau says people in the 20-29 age group have on average 3.4 cards - a figure which is higher than, or equal to, that for other age groups except 30-34, whose figure is 3.6.
But averages mask what is happening in certain circles. Ms Josephine Koh, 27, the finance manager of a firm selling skincare products, says: 'Among my friends, it's common to have at least half a dozen credit cards and as many as 10.'
Some, but not all, people can handle the easy credit. Says Ms Koh: 'We are sensible. We don't spend to the limit, and we know that the interest rate is not low.'
Education is key to reining in overspending among the young, say some observers. Schools and parents need to teach the young Personal Finance 101. If nothing else, parents should not be present a sad example themselves.
'If parents are excessive spenders, they set a bad example for their children,' says Mr Vincent Chen, 56, a father of two sons aged 27 and 29, and a committee chairman of the Securities Investors Association of Singapore. 'I don't think there's a difference between a $150 shirt and a $10 one. I'm glad my sons are sensible about money too.'
If the ranks of Generation D are growing in Singapore, the rate is even faster in some developed countries. In Singapore, 6.4 per cent of undischarged bankrupts were aged 30 or below as at the end of last year.
In Australia, of the 22,639 people going into bankruptcy in 2002 to 2003, 9 per cent were under 25. In the United States, about 120,000 people aged 25 or under filed for bankruptcy in 2000, up from 80,000 in 1991.
Naivete about money has cost them dearly - all for a few fleeting moments of the high life.
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