Let It Be...

SighZzz dd says she hated me now...
Perharps I did something wrong in agreeing on sat nite to let her send into the workshop but in fact I was silently hoping that she could back off at the last minute.
I keep telling myself to let it go, forget it...and I almost did..
then when the whole thing took so long until we can't even meet yesterday I became very angry again, Somemore when dd called to informed me that the whole thing could take quite a while, she sounded happy, like she thinks tat the $ was well-spent and it should b spent...All along to me it's a total waste...
the more I think abt it the siller I feel abt the whole thing then I could turn to no one but to write them all down...
I always think that we could sort things out but she got angry after reading what I wrote in the heat of the moment...now she dun even wan to talk to me...Fine
Let me be my fault, all my fault... I shouldn't have been too meddlesome, shouldn't have expect so much frm her, should have let her do everything her way, shouldn't have talk so much or provided her advices/solutions in the hope that she will follow them...(she never did anyway, facing me she has a mind of her own, facing others she will be manipulated by them)

Ya u can say I am calculating becos I keep reminding her abt $, but wat can I do? u wan me to stand and watch she sink deeper into the mire? or wait until everything's too late then start to voice out. I wan her to have a budget so that she will have enough to spend every month and possibly even some spare cash... No need to dig into her savings at all..U imagine this, if every month u have to dig into ur savings cos u are over budget then very soon even this little savings will run out. I dun wan her to develop this happen of keep touching her savings only use for emergencies...Is that wrong? Is that calculatives? why can't she see the hidden agenda?

She said she does have marriage on her minds..ya like keep saying that she wans this and tats for marriage. So this is her way of saying she have marriage on her mind right? As I mentioned earlier, mabbe I was wrong to expect too much frm her or expect her to put in the same effort as me..but in order to let her b a happy n beautiful bride I am constantly cracking my head on how to save more $, scimping and pinching everyday, then sudddenly u saw this "extravagant" thing happen, who won't be upset? At that instance I really feel that all my efforts are wasted u noe? Why can't she view it this way?

In my views, I dun think pacifying will get anyway, after all she've been pacifying her(her mum) and giving in all these years already but then wat happened? the same thing happen over and over again. So I feel perharps a hard approach would be better. Men are like tis u give them an in they wan a yard... when u r firm and they noe that they cannot gain any advantage then they will back off... After all they are mum n daughter so can't possibly carry on like tis 4ever...TO me she's please cos she has got her way and to put it crudely is "gloating" I dun understand why she's so happy over this...

She always say I dun understand her but have she taken some time to care about how I felt anot? HAve she ever taken time to note that throughout all these while she have never really listen and carry out any of my words, SHe will always listen to everyone except me. Wat other people told her is advice wat I told her is all crap.
I am sorry if I am too direct, I never chew my words...I was not born to please but to solve problems in the most correct way.

Who says I dun understand her? it's precisely this that I am so worried for her.
-I noe her mum is like that so I must ask her to stand up for herself keep giving in is definitely not a solution
-I noe she don't save that's why I ask her don't if possible touch her savings unless it's for emergencies, tis case is a non emergency and she went to touch of cos I am worried for her...
-I noe she will get angry(but didn't expect her to be so upset) but some1 will have to be the bad guy right?to constantly remind her else sooner or later everything will return to sq 1.

Anyway I've decided to give up, If she wants to carry on like this Let it be...I wash my hands off everything then perharps she will be happier and wun be sandwiched between her mum n me... I'll continue to play 2nd fiddle, shut my mouth up and just save $ quietly myself.Perharps this is the most ideal solution to her.After all in her eyes, I am nothing but a calculative, unreasonable, hard feeling , ignorant idiot who does not noe anything but scolding people....

My intentions not being appreciated is 1 thing, but being misunderstood is another...and it's really saddening