Grr..
just recieved my new SAFRA card, Thought that my safra membership will automatically be void once the old card expired this March but little did I know that they deduct $32 from my IPPT money and send me the new card... Sound a bit like those credit card scam rite? they never inform me that the membership will be automatically renewed if I didn't inform them... Feel so cheated.. hard to imagine such a big (and rich) organisation also uses such "tactics"...
One happy thing is that I've recieve the last instalment of my pay from Toshiba... hohoho good now nobody owe me any money (IPPT money also in already, but $32 short), also means no more money coming in sob... sob..
Haiz yesterday failed my first job interview.. Interviewed by a guy from IDS International... he said he's a IT company, very big and a MNC..and he's the software vendor for the dutch bank ABN AMRO need assistants like us to install his so-call security software to every users. During the interview, he asked for the EXACT words /sentence I would use to "persuade" the users to let me install the software into their computers. Wow sounds abit like sales right? guess i am not eloquent enough ..I beta stick to being a engineer haha.. anyway take the interview as a learning experience lor..no hard feelings on hearing that I dun really like the job also (haha no sour grapes here..)
Had a little tiff wif dd yesterday, I know she's under alot of stress this week because she suspect her dog got illness. somemore she's worried about her confirmation. so everytime I "type" to her in MSN, I will get the "NO MOOD" response..every conversation sure have this words.. make me quite frustrated as well cos typing to her is like she's not that interested also... her whole mind is about her doggie.. I think the best way is not to talk to her till sat after she visited the vet(with her dog of cos). Only then will she set her mind at ease. then can talk..else typing/talking to her grrrrrr make people feel so frustrating, can't help but make a jibe at her yesterday...
I feel I've slipped further down the rungs again... To me, I feel like my status is just her punching bag, for her to vent frustrations at me. whereelse all her love is divided between her dog, her family and her car. I feel so unimportant... way behind all those things/persons I've mentioned. Last time is only persons, now still have a dog and a car slotted in front of me..pushing me further down... She always say I can take care of myself so she pays more attention to her dog, but being able to take care of myself means I dun need TLC from my beloved? mabbe I am just being too sensitive (or it's because I am too free these days to think abt all these)watever the case I can't help but feel that I am more and more "unimportant" to her...
The dd I wan is someone who will love me with all her heart and must place a certain "importance" to me. At least she must make me feel that I'm important to her. And this is the dd I used to know in the past. but now with the new additions and new love I dun feel that "importance" anymore. Or rather I am feeling more and more unimportant...
Perharps I should contract a serious illness then I will know how and where she values me...
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
Saturday, June 25, 2005
NDP Preview Tickets!
Yeah I got my NDP preview tickets...
Though it's not the tickets to the actual day but still very happy cos I think I haven't been able to get such tickets for quite a long time already...
No need to queue overnight also..Yeah! Got a pair means can go with dd liao...
Look here's the tickets below...
Though it's not the tickets to the actual day but still very happy cos I think I haven't been able to get such tickets for quite a long time already...
No need to queue overnight also..Yeah! Got a pair means can go with dd liao...
Look here's the tickets below...
Friday, June 24, 2005
NS = King ah?
My younger bro recently got enlisted into army, been complaining that he got no time for this and for that lah...so my mum took his words literally and helped him with this and tat. Like when he needed some stuffs, she would go and buy it for him straightaway... or she would ask my youngest bro to serve him..like bring him his food and drinks (up to him) etc...
And then the problem is I don't see him having no time to do these stuffs himself, when he comes back he would be on the computer playing games or writing blogs or in MSN chating with god-knows-who. If he comes back at 7pm( nites off) then he would be seated in front of the computer from 715(computer need sometime to startup) till 30-45mins before the time he needs to book in. and when he comes back for the weekends he would be seated the whole day pausing only for a 30min lunch/dinner break.
If he's tired bcos of NS training, he should be sleeping rite? I dun see such a case in him leh...And I definitely do see a need to treat him like a king (do everything for him) when he comes back...
Yesterday I so fed up with my mum's constant helping that I spoke up... Wah NS=King ah? must help him do everything, he cannot do by himself meh? perharps I have always been quite independent at home, whenever possible I tried to do everything myself instead of relying on others that's why I see my NS bro's behavior I am very pissed off... One time when the kettle is boiling and he never even bother to go turn off the gas when everyone is busy and he's the most free (playing computer games) he acted like he never heard the sound of the whistling kettle... Grrr...
Ok back to the topic, when I spoke up my mum say I am very selfish dun wan to help him blah blah blah and not "qing qin" sibling love watever... wah kaoz! so angry with that remark. TO show that we care for siblings mean that we have to treat them like king? serve them? do watever they wan to do? then ok why not he serve me and help me do watever I wan? wat's this? *&%#@
then we went to the topic of buying b'fast every sun morn. usually it's either my parents of I went downstairs to buy... since they brought up this topic so I reminded them that it's usu. me... then my dad says the others haben wake up so i should go buy..wah so means that those who wake up early will have to serve those who wake up late lah? waking up late bcomes a excuse for laziness? my fault for waking up early?
where's the logic? I tell u this, my eldest bro and the NS bro sometimes purposely dun wan to wake up cos they dun wan to go down and buy b'fast. actually they have already woken but they still lie in bed. How come I noe, cos when I open the door when i came back wif b'fast, they would then come out...very sharp one timing also precise... coincidence mabbe? haha I doubt so.. so I was complaining that it's quite unfair... then my mum started all her cock-and-bull story of wat qing qin lah bros must help lah etc....
Grrr.....
And then the problem is I don't see him having no time to do these stuffs himself, when he comes back he would be on the computer playing games or writing blogs or in MSN chating with god-knows-who. If he comes back at 7pm( nites off) then he would be seated in front of the computer from 715(computer need sometime to startup) till 30-45mins before the time he needs to book in. and when he comes back for the weekends he would be seated the whole day pausing only for a 30min lunch/dinner break.
If he's tired bcos of NS training, he should be sleeping rite? I dun see such a case in him leh...And I definitely do see a need to treat him like a king (do everything for him) when he comes back...
Yesterday I so fed up with my mum's constant helping that I spoke up... Wah NS=King ah? must help him do everything, he cannot do by himself meh? perharps I have always been quite independent at home, whenever possible I tried to do everything myself instead of relying on others that's why I see my NS bro's behavior I am very pissed off... One time when the kettle is boiling and he never even bother to go turn off the gas when everyone is busy and he's the most free (playing computer games) he acted like he never heard the sound of the whistling kettle... Grrr...
Ok back to the topic, when I spoke up my mum say I am very selfish dun wan to help him blah blah blah and not "qing qin" sibling love watever... wah kaoz! so angry with that remark. TO show that we care for siblings mean that we have to treat them like king? serve them? do watever they wan to do? then ok why not he serve me and help me do watever I wan? wat's this? *&%#@
then we went to the topic of buying b'fast every sun morn. usually it's either my parents of I went downstairs to buy... since they brought up this topic so I reminded them that it's usu. me... then my dad says the others haben wake up so i should go buy..wah so means that those who wake up early will have to serve those who wake up late lah? waking up late bcomes a excuse for laziness? my fault for waking up early?
where's the logic? I tell u this, my eldest bro and the NS bro sometimes purposely dun wan to wake up cos they dun wan to go down and buy b'fast. actually they have already woken but they still lie in bed. How come I noe, cos when I open the door when i came back wif b'fast, they would then come out...very sharp one timing also precise... coincidence mabbe? haha I doubt so.. so I was complaining that it's quite unfair... then my mum started all her cock-and-bull story of wat qing qin lah bros must help lah etc....
Grrr.....
Thursday, June 23, 2005
Super Sianz Ahhhhhhhhh!
Just finished my attachment, so sianz at home nothing to do...Sighz can't find a suitable temp job also...so wat to do? gotta stay at home and rot lor...haha
nothing to do so decided to write(or type) lor...
Ah dd's family having problems financially again... common occurance boo hoo hoo. heard from dd that her mum have to go prawn jewlleries to buy clothes(~$200) for her bro and a $500 cupboard to keep his medals and game consoles.
I dunno why but i find them to be a strange family, they always seems to like the idea of spend-first-plan-later while i believe in doing things in the inverse way that is plan-first-spend-later. It seems that their parents like to buy those expensive stuffs even though sometimes they will be penniless after that. Why? I just dun understand...from wat dd say her dad wants to protect her and her bro so that ppl will not look down on them. So mabbe her dad(& mum) thinks that by having all the ex stuffs , it will show that they have a certain standard of living and ppl will not look down on them... Wat's the point? They are not that poor neither are they that rich... why must they keep buying stuffs that are not that important? I heard a salesman tell me this and I think it's very meaningful... "In Singapore you wun die, if you can only are poor than u live a poorer lifestyle lor, if you are rich then u live a richer lifestyle" which is very true. if you are poor what for u try to live a rich lifestyle? if ppl wan to look down on u then let them lor, wat's more impt? face or filling ur stomach? buying expensive stuffs can't fill ur stomach when u are hungry rite? Dunno y they can't see that...I think I may be wrong to critise her family like that but I think sometimes frm my observation over the years that her parents (esp her mum) are still quite naive... backdated thinking
and her bro too - should know that they have some problems financially, so should try to help by spending less and not spend more... so wat if he signs on? if he earns more then he will spend more...
dd's parents always ask her for $$, and never from her bro. dunno wat kind of thinking is that... mabbe they think that daughter will get married then will b other ppl's daughter already so must use the chance to squeeze every cent from her... and poor dd always have to give in to them cos she's very soft-hearted (to them only) even though she can scream and shout at every other person (including me). so all her $$ will be channeled there.
I used to have a wishful thinking that the big sum of $$ needed for our marriage can be saved by the both of us.. but I guess such a tot is pretty far-fetch now. If she keeps giving them $ then she can't save. If she dun give she will be the "unfillial child". Anyway I've quarrelled many times with her over these so much so until I am so sick and tired of these. She have to choose which side to "scarifice". Either our marriage plans or her parents guess it's quite a tough decision. But guess her parents is more important than anything else... Frankly speaking, I really wish she could contribute some amount to the marriage funds bcos the sums involved is really quite large...
So wat can I do? just have to keep trying to save as much as possible lor...else how? dunno how long that's gg to take...Lucky thing is that my parents(at least for now) are not like hers else really die ..think we will not be able to get married tis lifetime liao..
Anyway I think keep giving her parents $$ whenever they wan is also not a solution...
Must try to work frm the bro and her parents...ask them to change, make her bro realise the situation they are facing... and her parents to realise wat they are doing is so senseless...
If they had planned for everything years earlier and started saving then perharps now her bro dun even need to sign on to get the $$ for his Uni fees... No Big TV, no DVD player, NO PS2, no Home theatre speakers, No camcorder, No $1000 handphone... somemore they bought it when the product was just launched, imagine the price they paid then and the price now... haha all bcos of some "face" issue...
Anyway ppl will noe that her bro signed on bcos of the $$ (even though some ppl signed on bcos they LOVED SAF, but who believes?), and wat does that means? most ppl will think that it's cos his family not $$ to send him to U... so see the pt? ex or no ex gadgets, we have come one full circle and still "lose face"....
nothing to do so decided to write(or type) lor...
Ah dd's family having problems financially again... common occurance boo hoo hoo. heard from dd that her mum have to go prawn jewlleries to buy clothes(~$200) for her bro and a $500 cupboard to keep his medals and game consoles.
I dunno why but i find them to be a strange family, they always seems to like the idea of spend-first-plan-later while i believe in doing things in the inverse way that is plan-first-spend-later. It seems that their parents like to buy those expensive stuffs even though sometimes they will be penniless after that. Why? I just dun understand...from wat dd say her dad wants to protect her and her bro so that ppl will not look down on them. So mabbe her dad(& mum) thinks that by having all the ex stuffs , it will show that they have a certain standard of living and ppl will not look down on them... Wat's the point? They are not that poor neither are they that rich... why must they keep buying stuffs that are not that important? I heard a salesman tell me this and I think it's very meaningful... "In Singapore you wun die, if you can only are poor than u live a poorer lifestyle lor, if you are rich then u live a richer lifestyle" which is very true. if you are poor what for u try to live a rich lifestyle? if ppl wan to look down on u then let them lor, wat's more impt? face or filling ur stomach? buying expensive stuffs can't fill ur stomach when u are hungry rite? Dunno y they can't see that...I think I may be wrong to critise her family like that but I think sometimes frm my observation over the years that her parents (esp her mum) are still quite naive... backdated thinking
and her bro too - should know that they have some problems financially, so should try to help by spending less and not spend more... so wat if he signs on? if he earns more then he will spend more...
dd's parents always ask her for $$, and never from her bro. dunno wat kind of thinking is that... mabbe they think that daughter will get married then will b other ppl's daughter already so must use the chance to squeeze every cent from her... and poor dd always have to give in to them cos she's very soft-hearted (to them only) even though she can scream and shout at every other person (including me). so all her $$ will be channeled there.
I used to have a wishful thinking that the big sum of $$ needed for our marriage can be saved by the both of us.. but I guess such a tot is pretty far-fetch now. If she keeps giving them $ then she can't save. If she dun give she will be the "unfillial child". Anyway I've quarrelled many times with her over these so much so until I am so sick and tired of these. She have to choose which side to "scarifice". Either our marriage plans or her parents guess it's quite a tough decision. But guess her parents is more important than anything else... Frankly speaking, I really wish she could contribute some amount to the marriage funds bcos the sums involved is really quite large...
So wat can I do? just have to keep trying to save as much as possible lor...else how? dunno how long that's gg to take...Lucky thing is that my parents(at least for now) are not like hers else really die ..think we will not be able to get married tis lifetime liao..
Anyway I think keep giving her parents $$ whenever they wan is also not a solution...
Must try to work frm the bro and her parents...ask them to change, make her bro realise the situation they are facing... and her parents to realise wat they are doing is so senseless...
If they had planned for everything years earlier and started saving then perharps now her bro dun even need to sign on to get the $$ for his Uni fees... No Big TV, no DVD player, NO PS2, no Home theatre speakers, No camcorder, No $1000 handphone... somemore they bought it when the product was just launched, imagine the price they paid then and the price now... haha all bcos of some "face" issue...
Anyway ppl will noe that her bro signed on bcos of the $$ (even though some ppl signed on bcos they LOVED SAF, but who believes?), and wat does that means? most ppl will think that it's cos his family not $$ to send him to U... so see the pt? ex or no ex gadgets, we have come one full circle and still "lose face"....
Saturday, June 18, 2005
Double Happiness
So happy this week,
Recieved a call from the NDP organisers on thursday that my application for a NDP preview ticket have beeen successful haha...So many years didn't go NDP already so happy and excited that I managed to get 2 tickets from the ballot. Although it's only a preview ticket but I am contented at least there are many many more other singaporeans who can't get any tickets...haha Actually I am more concern abt the goodie bags haha always got many things inside...haha
Then sat(which is today) went for my 2nd non-ICT IPPT at Maju Camp. So happy managed to get GOLD again... My left shoelaces came off halfway during the 2.4 KM run then I have to re-tie it so worried that this little incident will make me lose many seconds and there goes my GOLD and my $400 from the govt...But luckily still managed to make it back in time for GOLD.. Yeah! gonna get $400 more in acct soon... more $ into my "L" driving funds hehe
Yesterday eat roti prata at Bukit Timah with dd, expensive roti prata and not nice somemore... worse than the roti prata then the ones sold at the coffeshop near my place. Grrr... kena cheated by dd's brother say that they roti prata there nice...Even a "sui pian" eater like me also find the prata there not nice. can even taste some uncooked flour...
Yesterday was also my Last day at Toshiba Electronics... Well nothing special from any of my bosses, small and big bosses also nv treat me lunch, dinner or anything..super stingy. Spent the last 2 days writing codes to analyse directories and MP3/WMA files cos I am TERIBBLY BORED...make my boss so happy cos means he got 1 thing less to do mah haha...
Aiyah now out of job no $ anymore, called a few job agencies but they also can't find any suitable temp jobs for me(cos I only got 1 more month free mah) think gonna stay at hm and rot till sch reopen liao lor... looking forward to next month...if dd kena confirmed than we can go celebrate and eat CRABs! long time no eat crabs liao lor...Yum Yum. Maybe I will be the one paying lah but nvm...DDs shouldn't be too calculating to each other right?
Recieved a call from the NDP organisers on thursday that my application for a NDP preview ticket have beeen successful haha...So many years didn't go NDP already so happy and excited that I managed to get 2 tickets from the ballot. Although it's only a preview ticket but I am contented at least there are many many more other singaporeans who can't get any tickets...haha Actually I am more concern abt the goodie bags haha always got many things inside...haha
Then sat(which is today) went for my 2nd non-ICT IPPT at Maju Camp. So happy managed to get GOLD again... My left shoelaces came off halfway during the 2.4 KM run then I have to re-tie it so worried that this little incident will make me lose many seconds and there goes my GOLD and my $400 from the govt...But luckily still managed to make it back in time for GOLD.. Yeah! gonna get $400 more in acct soon... more $ into my "L" driving funds hehe
Yesterday eat roti prata at Bukit Timah with dd, expensive roti prata and not nice somemore... worse than the roti prata then the ones sold at the coffeshop near my place. Grrr... kena cheated by dd's brother say that they roti prata there nice...Even a "sui pian" eater like me also find the prata there not nice. can even taste some uncooked flour...
Yesterday was also my Last day at Toshiba Electronics... Well nothing special from any of my bosses, small and big bosses also nv treat me lunch, dinner or anything..super stingy. Spent the last 2 days writing codes to analyse directories and MP3/WMA files cos I am TERIBBLY BORED...make my boss so happy cos means he got 1 thing less to do mah haha...
Aiyah now out of job no $ anymore, called a few job agencies but they also can't find any suitable temp jobs for me(cos I only got 1 more month free mah) think gonna stay at hm and rot till sch reopen liao lor... looking forward to next month...if dd kena confirmed than we can go celebrate and eat CRABs! long time no eat crabs liao lor...Yum Yum. Maybe I will be the one paying lah but nvm...DDs shouldn't be too calculating to each other right?
Thursday, June 02, 2005
Lost Control
I don't know why these few days I've been jittery. I keep fearing that dd will not be able to save $. Or fear that even if she do manage to save, her $ will be siphon off by some people. I know dd dun like me to keep bringing this up and I kept telling myself not to think about this matter, I dun know why I just can't. Maybe it's because I had high hopes for our future. Or mabbe it's because I still can't get over the fact that i help dd to purchase her car but now I am left with nothing.
Or it's the combination of both. I guess it's the fear of losing everything. I've no choice, I've to write it down somewhere..
I am left puzzled, previously, she's so adamant that she put her savings into our OUB acct to keep them away from the prying eyes of her mum, but now all of a suddenly she's dropped her interest totally, very unwilling to do so. a full 180 degrees change. I know their family's spending habits that's why I still think it's a better idea to keep them in a safe place. I will NEVER touch the $. Maybe it's beacause she is afraid that I will runaway with her $. If we can't even have the simple trust between us then how are we gg to live together in the future?
I guess the best thing for me to do now is to forget the whole matter, and leave everything to fate, do it in her family's style if got $ then marry if no $ then wait.. wait.. wait... Guess that's the only way to keep all of us happy, at least most...
All I need now is answer, an assurance from dd that she will safeguard her $ carefully and keep steering towards our common cause. Somehow or rather I feel that she's hiding something from me and i feel it's some $ things. perharps i am too sensitive, afterall to me, there's suppose to be no secrets between us.
Must quickly forget the whole thing and be happy again...
Or it's the combination of both. I guess it's the fear of losing everything. I've no choice, I've to write it down somewhere..
I am left puzzled, previously, she's so adamant that she put her savings into our OUB acct to keep them away from the prying eyes of her mum, but now all of a suddenly she's dropped her interest totally, very unwilling to do so. a full 180 degrees change. I know their family's spending habits that's why I still think it's a better idea to keep them in a safe place. I will NEVER touch the $. Maybe it's beacause she is afraid that I will runaway with her $. If we can't even have the simple trust between us then how are we gg to live together in the future?
I guess the best thing for me to do now is to forget the whole matter, and leave everything to fate, do it in her family's style if got $ then marry if no $ then wait.. wait.. wait... Guess that's the only way to keep all of us happy, at least most...
All I need now is answer, an assurance from dd that she will safeguard her $ carefully and keep steering towards our common cause. Somehow or rather I feel that she's hiding something from me and i feel it's some $ things. perharps i am too sensitive, afterall to me, there's suppose to be no secrets between us.
Must quickly forget the whole thing and be happy again...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
RSS Feed (xml)
