Why everyone bullys me?

Why does it seems that everyone wans to bully me?

In school:

during projects, i do work, others copied mine to submit...

Do FYP, delegate work but no output in the end, i ended up doing most of the things

At Home:

I became sick on saturday, fever, whole body was lethargic still being asked to cycle to Post Office to get Phone book (while my brothers slept/play computer games)


Whenever something breaks down, i gotta repair it(the others don't care) and if I don't i will b scolded as being selfish and dun wan to contribute to family

Anything tat comes to contributing $$, i gotta contribute, if i dun i will b scolded again



how comes it's seems like when i am kind-hearted to help, people take me for granted.. after a while, they get used to the help and when i dun rendered any help I m bad...why is it so hard to please everyone?

i've decided to go on a hol in dec, boss please dun stop me...

The happiest people in the world are not those who have no problems,
but those who learn to live with things that are less than perfect.

Big house, small house; Good Loc,Bad Loc

HDB started balloting it's unsold flats at Tanglin Halt recently, dd and i also went to join in the crowd... price of flat is abt $260k-$320k for the 4rm flats... abit steep if u ask me... it's even more expensive than a exec flat in JW...

comparison between blk 628-630 JW n 4rm queenstown:

JW Queenstown

size: 130 sq m 85-90 sq m

Price: $260k-270k $264k-320k

Amentities: many, but quite far west established
not easily assessible assessible
far away frm town near town


so the debate is to live in establish estate n pay more $$ nearer to many amentities or live futher away frm town , more comfortably? difficult choice ...

However my view is this is not the crux of the prob... to b honest, i m very keen to get a hse... but i m not sure abt dd.. i really dunno her level of commitment...cos a house is a SUPER BIG commitment, I really cannot do it by myself... and here i DON'T mean CPF monies... i mean REAL HARD CASH.... cos if we are gg to have a house of cos we wan to move in ASAP right? cannot leave it lying there collect dust, like a white elephant... that's not right isn't it? renovations, furniture, electrical applicances blah blah blah cannot b paid off by CPF... what about the monthly utilities bill, the groceries bills? all these must be taken into consideration...cannot expect me to pay for EVERYTHING bah right? how long is that gg to take me? 5yrs at least...my most optimistic estimation...
But everytime i touch on this topic, she becomes defensive n unhappy, i m not asking for much lor not even 1/2 the amt i trying to save a mth...mabbe 20% would b ok even...


I blive a home is for 2 person so both must contribute to take ownership (NOT CPF!!!)... i don't mind paying majority, but not ALL... tat's a bit too far fetched...

Although dd keep saying wan to buy hse but seriously i dun see much action frm her... except for her new hobby: wakeboarding... which is another quite expensive sport... now she wants to learn diving... requirements nv end... She says i m not into that type of sports, but one thing i dunno she understands or not tat is I can go wakeboard, surf board watever board, dive etc... if i wan but wat does tat all end up to? NO HOUSE, NO BANQUET,NO HONEYMOON,NOTHING... cos why? all $$ dumped into these costly sports...

Now i am not saying cannot do all these sports, it's good actually but just in moderation and understand that if u really wan a hse, u hav to b commited n stay commited,...sometimes need to adjust our lifestyle n habits n make some scarifices...
To maintain a house and a family requires commitment from both parties... not just one...

Until both of us are commited n focus only then can we work it out...

I m already commited in pursing these goals, already dreamt of shopping for sofas, beds etc... and buying a dry cabinet to put our photography stuffs in liao... but until dd figure out wat she really wants now and sets her prority right, all these can only b dreams....

fallen sick already, very lethagic, try taking a paranormal pic haha 1st try....wif old nikon 885



also tried panning shots wif my camera phone(while waiting for bus to go dd's hse).. frankly speaking the effects are quite good leh... hehe

Hoo Ho got the vaccum

After coming several NTUCs finally managed to get the "auto wet dry vacuum cleaner" dd wanted

A recap...

Tues night->Lot1 NTUC, wed Afternoon->JE NTUC, Wed Evening->Sheng siong->Bukit Panjang NTUC

finally got it at bukit panjang, only 4 sets left





Oh ya payday on thursday, deposited another $1200 into UOB acct...so happy UOB acct is growing again... however it's quite slow (dunno whether got way to speed it up or not)...
Must start to distribute $$ again.... $300 to parents, $40 personal expenses, $30 for ezylink card blah blah blah...

Got our (dd n my) 1st camera back, the nikon e885 now at my house, abit old n slow, but still great fun to play wif... now snapping almost anything tat i feel is nice... snap snap snap... kekeke

Nicks'

Rather worried on saturday when dd nv contact me cos she was suppose to b back on friday evening... usually she will contact me when she come back from overseas...send me SMS like "dd i back liao" or something like tat... mabbe she was too tired to send ... but i think i did sms her on friday evening but she nv replied tat's why i bcame worried anyway she replied on saturday... but she was busy enjoying her wakeboarding session that she 4got her dd... haiz... sometimes I think our gender should swap...she should b a guy n I a gal... looks like our personalities are like tat...

I am still suffering from the meat overdose from this morning Bak Kut Teh...(dd should noe) ... wah so full, so guilty...

Been thinking of our new nick for quite some time.. seems tat I made a mistake in the whole construction...
Some explanation:
"Monkdees" is the name i tot up.. it's actually the merger of "monkey", which both of us belong and "Dees", cos we call dds mah.. "dd" = "deardear"
However monkeys are pronounced "Mon" + "Keys" and not "monk" + "eys" .. so the correct word for "monkdees" should be "mondees" so which one sounds nicer? the orginal one? or the new one w/o the "K"? think they should have the same pronounciation...

Updates

Getting busier by the day... looks like can't much time to blog real soon...Here are some updates

Went to the Singapore zoo on sunday wif dd... well paid for the tickets ourselves ..who needs the zoo pass ... :P
Have quite a lot of fun there and took a lot of pictures, basically it's more of a photography trip... hehe almost forgot abt the time... haha Picture wise some don't turn out that good lah...mainly because of poor photographers ... hehe (still "L" photographers leh) + the strong afternoon sunlight... woo nvm will improve next time... many are not bad though... haha

The whole week dd not around cos she left for Bintan... Kinda missed her though... really hope for the next sunday to come faster then can see her again and cuddle her again (kinda mushy hor).....
Then boss started "pressurising" us abt the "project" he gave to us... Well kinda unfair to us cos we are still undergoing the training program and can't spare much time during office hours to do that project... anyhow only 3 out of abt 15 of us doing the project... cos only those new guys from IS department doing and I m one of them... I think boss's intention is to see us work OT... lotsa OTs cos most ppl in my dept are doing that... rushing projects, no choice haha..for us we always leave at 530pm sharp... well i think soon we will have to work late liao ... but then i will try not work work late on tues,thurs and sunday... cos tues ,thurs i go running... sunday gotta accompany dd... going back on sunday is a strict no-no for me.. haha
Well kinda tough going now.. cos the software is a entire new thing for me... and there's no 1 free to teach us... it's not help by the fact that our equipment are either "borrowed" from us or just missing... Haiz i think boss have a big expectation of us..but guess we gotta disappoint him liao sorry boss...

last but not least, there are 2 new addition to my family haha... my bro brought back 2 rabbits according to him,his fren's rabbits gave birth too many so give my bro 2...so cute... hope they dun stink ... my bro say they are the minature species...

The new addition to my family...

DrAt, failed again

Failed to get the complimentary zoo pass again... grrh...
wanted to go there to test our new lens... kekeke
4 person applied for it , there are 2 zoo pass so got 50% chance tat i will get it but then failed...
looks like my luck is damn bad... should i try again? sometimes i feel just forget it lah... pay for the trip myself (if we wan), always cannot get the pass, somemore abit paiseh seems like a regular at the balloting exercise liao .. hehe

SOS!!! MY PC is DYING!

The title of this blog have also been the message on my MSN for quite some time liao...
My PC keeps hanging... dunno whether it's a windows problem or the whole system or just the graphics card problem...

it will hang itself after a while, and when i tried to restart it it just wun budge... then i had to switch off the power and on it again and hopefully it will startup... I get the error say a "drawing operation failed to complete" tat's wat causing the "hang"

so is my graphics card causing problems? or my old computer is dying? keep hanging so annoying... grrh... and it had to happen at a time like this when I have no $$... sobsob

just now nearly wan to buy a 2nd hand graphics card...inno3d GForce 5500 256MB for $50 but then what happens if it's not the graphics card that is causing the prob? it's the MB or windows? then i will end up wif 2 graphics card... how how?

wat should I do? buy new system? change graphics card?

Computer, pls dun die...

DD's Gift

Got a present from dd... HurraY!!!

Long time no get present liao...a few mths liao I think hehe....so happy



If u are wondering wat this is.. it's a name card holder... haha cute right?

Nice Old Song

Meaningful Lyrics, nice animation...

too small?

Click here

Yeah!!! I made it...

Yeah... managed to keep my expenditures under control, shows my planning is quite ok hehe
from my last payday till now only spent only $304 hehe... haha even though during the last month I bought 3 G2000($19x3=$57) shirts n went to underwater world($38)...

Hope every month will turn out to b like last month and savings will b on track... haha
must continue to work hard, b disciplined n save... hei sho hei sho

Are all parents like that?

Quite pissed off with some of the remarks made by my parents yesterday but i managed to keep my calm and let the storm passed... the story goes like this...

My parents bought a house in Muar Malaysia just before I was born so the house is almost 30 years old already lah... now they are considering selling the house because it's quite a chore colleting rent... As u know lah, the house old liao and never renovate all these year so a bit rundown... so my mum's auntie suggest she repaint the house (and made some renovation) so that it won't look that old and rundown and easier to sell...

My "resourceful" mother then suggested we go back to muar and repaint the house ourselves... yah just me and her... so u can guess at the end of the day it will be only me that will be doing the painting... so immediately i shot back: "6 hrs (3 to go there, 3 to come back) trip just to do painting?, u must be crazy " ... I mean there must be a better way right? like hiring some workers in M'sia to paint the house, somemore painting the whole house, can't finished in 1-2 days right?...

Then my parents got angry and started making scarastic remarks...

my mum:
says that i dun wan to go back cos i wan to be wif my dd over the weekends...

my dad:
says very angry that I am "zhi li pa wai" meaning I only help others ( referring to dd) and wun help the family , unfillial blah blah blah... very nan ting (hard to swallow words) .. somemore say if next time my own hse need help he also wun help...then fine lor i seldom depend on him anyway (except for $$ hehe) Grrrh...

I was quite pissed off then ... wat I said is wrong meh? make a trip to Msia just to do painting? come on lah I am not as free as last time leh... I am already working leh like tat rush here rush there not tired meh? very stupid right to go all the way there to do painting? ...

I pei my dd got wrong meh? I only pei my dd one day a week... alot meh? I feel it's very little liao but can't help it (cos of my laziness and the rising transport cost haha)... I don't think when they are PT that time, they only meet each other once a week lor... (dunno how to say themselves)... anyway I think tat's a valid reason also wat...if got hol then mabbe still can negotiate...repainting not that important that have to be done straightaway right?

The most piss-off thing that I find abt them is that they cannot accept rejection... they never take into consideration how I tried to help them when I can... and when I reject their request they immediately shoot words back at me... Who help them do spring cleaning? who help them run errands? everything they say I must say "Yes" meh? I cannot say "No" when I got no time or really dun think it's necessary? I must do watever they wan then is fillial ah? pls lor I wun do that...

Or mabbe it's cos I am too sui pian that's why they take me for granted... almost everything gonna come to me...

Some of my present tots..

Saw my neighbour's daughter and her husband in the lift just now... he daughter is only 1 yr older than me but already happily married (i presume) and wif a 1 yr old baby already...Such bliss.... found out frm my mum tat she is staying wif her husband's family at Yishun..Hmmm so not so good after all haha cos they haben have their own hse yet... but then saw that they are holding on to a yellow booklet which I think is the sales brochure for the JE and JW walk-in selection... so they are planning to buy a hse in JW/JE also... hehe just like me and dd...haiz but no more flats for us....gotta wait for next batch

sometimes I ponder whether it's more difficult to be a man or a woman in singapore(especially)..
For women:
Cast the physiological stuffs aside, sometimes I feel tat they succumb too easily to peer pressure and temptation especially those flowery talks (too bad I haben mastered it after so many years, my talks are all thorny haha, dd must be real sad).. other stuffs leave it to women to comment themselves haha

For Man:
they have to handle their family and their wives or at least future wife... Now the society is all abt money , after graduation u gotta pay this loan, that loan.. and have to handle the tricky relationship between their family and their girlfriends... Very often it's not wat we wan to do then we can do.. they are just too many implications...take for instance, a marriage proposal.. to some it may seem to be just the affair between the bride and the groom but some "old-fashioned" n stubborn parents dun see it tat way even in this 21th century... go ROM too early, they say u are desperate or they suspect something is already wriggling inside the girl. too late, the girl (and her family) will not be happy... sometimes it's really hard to satisfy both parties.. and the matter is made worse by both sides being not understanding, and the men is sandwiched in the middle...Don't listen to parents, u are unfillial, do listen to gf, she say u dun love her... Haiz... tat's the same case wif the allowance thingy now working got added responsibility and burdens, situation now is more shaky given that the guy have just started working and a yet-to-be confirmed staff so u can say he only got 1/2 a C so how to marry?...

Right now my no1 priority is to save as much as I can... hopefully can get a house as soon as 1 become available... and to do that I will need help from dd... wif my own strength, the effect is meagre there is only so much I can do and save... if I do get a hse, i wan to make sure it doesn't stay a white elephant for a long time... I wan to stay in it asap so I will need tons of money to make my little dream happen... some of my colleagues are comtemplating buying a car... with my present salary I think I can afford a car also not a OPC but a normal car... i can't say that I m not tempted (u should see the MRT commuters in the morning rush hrs and how I sweat like hell every morning...phew) but I think I can't cos if I do tat all my planned savings would go into the "mouth" of the car, i would have nothing left for my little hse... so now must save save save then can have a chance to own my little hse... however saving itself is a hard thing.. sometimes there are something(eg..computer,etc...) tat broke down and needed replacements or u see that nice nice MP3/MP4 player tat u LOVED very much and swoosh away goes ur hard-earned money... it really breaks the momentum...

Heard alot of "horror" stories frm the seniors in my coy... how hard work it is to be a software engineer, gotta work late into the nights (but no OT pay), only the super smart survives blah blah blah... dunno whether I have made the correct choice to be a software engineer or not.. but my interest is definitely in writing codes and some electronics hardware work(so I guess this work kinda suit my interest)... dunno interest can be turned into $$?

BTW, one of my colleagues broke the bond and decides to leave the company (and join another one which he claims he have much more interest in the job) and he gotta pay $11k ... he's 21 this year an indian national.. think he too young thus still very fickle-minded... dunno how he going to find $11k to pay the coy... haiz that's the price to pay for being indecisive i think

Not-so-good saturday

Today not very good for me,... my default windowsXP theme suddenly disappear then I loaded up with the classic windows theme, the gray window2000 one... then no matter wat I do I still can't get it back ... Grrr... I think I kena some virus... wasted almost an hr restarting and starting the computer...

In the end, gotta do a system restore to get my orginal windows theme back...
but in the process I lost some of the files which I installed after the system restore... oh well at least I got my theme back...

wanted to buy another G2000 shirt, the gray one which dd said is nice... didn't buy it at Tiong Bahru cos they dun have my size at that outlet... somemore my mum made a mistake and told me that this shirt cannot be ironed straight...grr so dun really dare to invest but in the end even if I wan to they dun have my size.... but the problem is I dunno which outlet has my size... search internet also can't find all the numbers for the outlet... gotta ask one by one meh? tedious...

sighz think just give up the idea lor...

Double Whammy

Haiz hit a double whammy today, very unlucky...
1st of all, didn't get the zoo pass cos lost the ballot...
2nd, can't get tickets to "pirates of the carribean" cos the only seats available are those at the front... grr...

But then managed to get a shirt at G2000 at $19 ... hehe now I can be a potato(cos the shirt is potato color)... but both my dd n mum say nice so guess being a potato is not tat bad.. haha

My other fren went to Siemens for interview today... well he managed to clear the "test" easily cos of my help (i told him abt the qns so tat he can prepare beforehand) but dunno whether he will be accepted or not... if he's accepted means another $500 if he's confirmed haha

Did something good also yesterday.. managed to help me frens get additional convocation tickets hehe...

Yeah! I finally got my own namecard...haha 1st time now I feel more like a working professional hehe
3rd week at siemensVDO adapting fine I guess, I think mainly cos there are many new employees so we sort of got a small little gang hehe and not so marginalised by the cold reception of our seniors (cos they are real busy lah not like us so free)

........ ....... .......

why everyone seems to be so rich nowadays while I am so poor...
sad... sad...

Additions to the NTU family in Siemens

Heard that one of my fren will be joining Siemens in the coming weeks and another have managed to secure an interview... By right i should be happy right? cos if they are confirmed I MAY get a referral fee of $500 for each head... somemore it means that the NTU family in siemens will be growing.. but I say may cos I dunno if this scheme applies to "unconfirmed" staffs like me... haiz...

Anyway I dunno but sometimes I find it hard to work wif someone who likes to brag about his achievements... (like my elder bro...) no doubt u noe some staffs but sometimes I dun really like the way they say it across lor... sounds very arrogant to me and I dun really fancy arrogant and braggards haha... anyway I can't choose my colleagues so no choice lor...

anyway I think my attitude today when speaking to my fren was quite bad cos I was having a headache and the weather is quite warm... (it doesn't help that he's asking some stupid qns that I can't find any ans for it eg. how come u reach home so fast? why didn't meet ur gf today?) .. very sorry for tat attitude...

Also have been thinking abt dd and me also... how we can "click" together... now I got a tot, tat is our character makes us "interdependent". For me when I wan to make decisions, I would like a 2nd or 3rd opinion and then analyse them before making decisions, u can say I am indecisive but I always think it's better to get a 2nd opinion to help in making more correct (and better) decisions... For me my 2nd n 3rd opinion comes frm dd haha (she should noe I always consult her even the color and make of my shirts ) usually I always wan her to acompany me to buy such stuffs for the abovementioned reason hehe but she always very uninterested... haha She is more decisive than me lah (but doesn't mean she always make correct decision)... somemore if anything happen can push the blame to her mah haha... just joking...

And becos I am a more logical person while she is more impulsive I think I am her nemesis hehe I help keep her bad habits in check( if I can see it and she lets me) so in this sense we are mutally dependent hehe

Did I?

Heard many instances of my frens getting a better starting pay than me... Haiz.. now a bit begining to wonder whether I've made the correct choice to becoming a software engineer, or more specifically a firmware one... According to him, we can make much more by becoming a project manager.. or moving into project management cos the pay should be higher over there and u dun have to crack ur brains like mad like when u are a developer on a project... Anyway for me now, I dun think my interest is in management lor... no doubt it's a possiblity tat we may get into it..but I think for now my interest lies in development...
But in some sense he is right, now we are debt ridden by the study loan, so hack care the nature of the job, as long as it pays alot who cares... like DSTA, but according to some "deserters" , the job at DSTA sucks...
I dunno why but the more I think of it I feel that my fren's view is abit simple-minded lor... Give u more $$ of cos ask u to work harder/more lah right? which coy will be so good to pay u alot of $$ to slack around? wif more $$, means also more responsibilities. Things in life is not tat simple right? U are clever but ur employers are also not stupid...makes sense?

Who won't want to have a very high pay? at the same time I also want a job that interests me..
To tell u the truth when I heard that people got more than $3000 tarting pay, I also a bit sad/disappointed cos I would say damn why can't I get so much? I think I decided too early, forfieted my chance too soon..

Anyway I think siemens VDO is a good place for me to learn alot of things... like whether I am suitable for this line, good enough? competent enough...? Anyway I am contented wif my current life, current job... to be content is bliss right? just think that although my pay is not the highest but it's also not the lowest.. however, I think it would b better if we had some OT pay kekeke

"RnD Software Engineer" stills sounds more appealing to me haha