Start of Term Break

Time fly so fast, next week would be my 1 week term break, not really for relaxation but in fact for us to catch up with any lagging school work.
Can't really relax during the week, cos still got FYP,HRM and 2 reports to finished plus another test which is immediately after the term break....
Wah looks like I am gonna be quite busy next week.. After the 1 week term break will begin another franatic race to the exams which is about 1 and 1/2 month after the break, exams begin on the 2nd of Nov, all the way to 24 Nov...So fast just start the new sch year so fast exams looming liaoz...Sighz..Exams means I gotta go retreat to my books so cannot see dd liao...think I will miss her as always..but her...ahhh don't think she will miss me lah..she got so many ppl to pei her and all of them more important companions than me...ppl like her parents lah, didi lah, ronnie, sunshine lah wif so many things in her heart where got place for me? even if got also only a little bit...*sighz*

Oh by the way, I am getting a new driving instructor, Coincidently, his name is also "Ronnie" same as dd's dog and my NS time OC. haha. This Sat no driving lesson for me because my ex drv instructor Mr Eng who transfered me to Mr Ronnie told him only last last night and very late so now Mr Ronnie have now timeslots for me..Hmm...alot ppl learning drv nowadays ah? Instructor also fully booked...Fuel prices so high still got so many ppl learn drv? Oh well next week then start lessons wif Mr Ronnie, hope he is friendly and wun anyhow scold/nag ppl.. don't like ppl sit beside me keep nagging and scolding like my army's drv instructors...grrr... Only went to drv cct once so not quite famaliar wif the place..think have to go there a few more times to familise then can take the practical drv test.. Hopefully can pass 1st time..
Pray pray Learning drv is really a big financial strain on me(esp when I am picking up the tab myself, cct lah, drv lessons lah all so ex..and I have no income somemore)sob...sob I think got someone once said wan to pay $$ let me learn drv but dunno who liao hor...*scratch head* Think max. can take 2x drv test then have to break into the piggy bank in OUB...

Another thing, so happy today, I finally found and solved the problem in the MCU program I am writing for my FYP. Grr..quite obvious the error, should have spotted it earlier...
think I quite confused by the many long lines of codes(should have at least 1000-2000 lines blah)...haha
Seems that my code-reading skills which I picked up in poly and in IA does help to siphon the codes...haha
Tested it on a simulator/emulator but hope that when burned into the actual chip it will be able to work...

Ok gtg tata!

Eventful Weekend

Sat:

Went for my last Drv lesson wif my drv instructor Mr Eng, from next week onwards gg to take lesson from his fren. Well funny right how come he cannot teach me all the way till my test... Well cos he don't have the BBDC membership so have to "give" me to someone wif BBDC membership so that I can take the driving test, guess this is a good way to save $$ for those pte drv instructors, they "collabrate", each take membership wif one drv center but they can teach students from everywhere just when the test date come, they just "give" to the instr wif the membership, so one person no need to take multiple memberships to teach students from different location.
Well, Mr Eng after my 4mths of drv lesson wif him is quite a nice guy lah, but as a instructor he is so-so lah cos sometimes he makes funny judgements, but skill-wise he is undoubtly good...and he keep saying that I am "too safe" ..haha carried fwd frm my exp as a army truck driver, Army kiasi one keep asking ppl to be safe safe and safe..thus got this mindset in me lor..so sometimes I dilly-dally at junctions cos I wan to confirm and confirm... haha..think must change lah must be a bit more "daring"
Did alot of parkings the whole of sat, parallel and vertical, cos I guess parking is my weakest link. cos though I do have some drv exp in army, but as my vehicle is big, the parking sequence is usually guided(by ruling,haha) somemore haben been drv for 3+ years already so kinda rusty haha ... Well think now after sat's practice I am quite comfy wif parking wif poles already though I do hit some poles haha but that's purposely one cos I wan to know wat i will c if my vehicle hit any of the poles. Must register that mental image in my mind as a guage of distance mah(no probs in normal lot,no poles to knock down haha.) Mr Eng said I should be able to pass 1st time, hope I wun let him down... Also hope that the new instructor will be good also.. haha

Sun:

DD as usual never called to ask me when to go her hse, as usual I gotta SMS to ask her...then she called to say that her vaccum broke down...but when I got there, she said ok liao (not I fixed huh, dun be mistaken). Then we went to Upp Paya Lebar to look for cheap rollerblades(dd pester me to buy so that I can blade wif her) cos she say newspaper advertise there got cheap blades. And so we went lor...Raining heavily but luckily still managed to find the place wif the help of the trusty street directory and a call to the shop haha. Then we found a cheap pair of blades (california Pro) $69 only...At 1st some1 say wan to pay for me wor, but when come to pay bill time, that "some1" ran away wor... Well as expected lah..so not at all angry nor surprise..Too bad lor gotta pay from my dwindling savings..now only left $745 in POSB + $300(reserved for drv lessons) in drawer sob...sob... Then dd went to the petshop nearby to buy some stuffs for ronnie.
After that we went to Bishan(anyhow drive there) to have lunch...After tat went to Junction 8 to jalan jalan....Then saw the Fila duffel bag dd bought sometime back..and I also bought one there, offer mah then can have "dd bag" (too bad not at all dd cos her fren also hav one).
Then went inside Man's studio (I didn't know when I went in cos nv look at signboard). dd saw a shirt that she want to buy for her bro: Reason: cos he paid $50 for her petrol one time. so she very grateful lor... must buy shirt as "repayment". Shirt is $46. My bday only got a small little bear bear think should be abt $9.90 at most and bought conveniently at the gift shop below her coy.(somemore is I pester one leh, cos me very poor thing,bday no1(all bros) give me present..all act blur but when their bday come I always give them presents,*sigh* too bad lah I am the sucker always)Think hor I also got help her in $$ terms leh, when she doing PT studies and no $$,occassionally I will give her $50(frm NS pay cos I also dun earn much then) think abt 2-3 times...and also got help her pay for many other things leh..think far far exceed $50 (her sunshine I also got share think I should be able to own 4 tyres and 4 doors.hehe)...how come I no "repayment present" but her didi got? unfair...unfair...me jealous of her didi liaoz...Anyway I also nv expected any frm her cos I noe she also not rich, but I still feel unfair, humph,sob sob...

Wah nowadays be her didi like better than dd leh..he gone for 3 weeks, she already miss him very much already,,dunno whether she will miss me if I am away for 3 weeks also..hmm think wun lah...after all didi is almost 20yrs feeling, dd only around 6 years so can be understooded...think I must apply to be her didi rather than dd liaoz...

***I wan to be dd's didi...I wan to be dd's didi...I wan to be dd's didi...

dd bag

Mei Shi Jian

Into my final year at NTU already, at first glance, my timetable looks quite relax. Now assignments are piling up...and they are adding up faster than I can complete them. B4 I complete the earlier ones, new ones have come.. ahh..sianz man like suddenly alot of work to do.
Especially that stupid HRM(Human resource Management),
Wat must interview managers lah, do case studies, and design and develop a product and patent it. Stupid right? worst of all we have NO development funds meaning we have to come up wif the $ ourself to develop the prototype of our product...Grrr...Still have some other assignments tat we need to do and still got tutorials and revision...and FYP...Wah haha...
Nvm think will be able to cope haha.Been coping well but quite lazy to start work on some assignments as the dateline are still quite far away(more than 2wks=far haha).
Bought 2 gadgets recently, my Adata 512MB Thumbdrive for $54(with lifetime warranty somemore) and my $178(bought during offer at courts)Epson stylus CX3500 cos my 2yr old lexmark printer ran out of black ink and I am quite reluctant to buy new one to replace cos the cart cost $50..no point keep buying mah, so decided to change to a new printer in which the ink cost cheaper(Epson's durabite ink cost less than $20, color abt $12,black abt $18). Wah think I getting more and more extravagant these days..Found that can be addicted to spending leh, now keep wanting to buy stuffs haha and getting poorer by the day.

My Thumbdrive

My Epson CX3500

Been pondering whether to change to HP or Epson, but dd say Epson good and my fren also say Epson's ink cheaper than HP's so in the end chose to buy Epson printer...so far so good leh, the scanner quality is superb...

My mum's Panasonic digicam repaired liao lor, can take pics again. haha

Sunboi's review of Samsung D500C

I've been using the samsung e700a for one and a half year before it became "ill" a few days ago. I've to say I've been largely impressed by it's slick curves and it's VGA camera. The VGA camera produces the best pictures among it's peers.

If you are thinking that the D500C with it's 1.3MP camera produces digicam-quality shots then I think you will be disappointed. The 1.3MP camera merely captures a larger picture max at 1280x1024 pixels. The quality is almost the same as the e700a. However it seems that the picture is not sharp enough for my likely.Perharps i am used to digital cameras that's why i am not impressed by the "soft" shot taken with a phone camera. There is no slot for memery cards unlike it's competing models like the Nokia 6680,6670,6230 or the Sony Ericcson K750i among others. Thus the size for media is limited to just 96MB which is to be shared with ringtones,MP3s,pictures and photos which is not very large considering the large amount of content users downloaded into their phones. The D500C cannot support the viewing of animated GIFs as well.
Samsung always seems to be one step behind it's competitors in terms of functionalities of it's phones. The phone is not cheap as well, it costs $688 for a no contract phone and $488 with 2 yrs contract(almost the same as a 3G nokia 6680)

pics taken with D500C max size and quality

Pics taken with D500C in total darkness using autoflash(sorry never focus properly)


However the design of the D500C is very sleek, the slider has good feel. The samsung LCD as usual is great with very vivid colors. With this phone, you no longer need to transfer data through the Samsung PIMS and File Manager like older phones. U can just transfer media contents just by selecting the content frm the phone and "send" it to PC using one of the sending options provided; email,IR,bluetooth etc... just like the right-click of PCs. It is also bluetooth enabled. Configuration of it is very simple and I paired with my friend's Nokia 6680 and my china-made bluetooth dongle effortlessly. The interface was upgraded to the icon-based type which looks more user-friendly. A sound-mate aka loudspeaker was included to increase the sound of the phone and I say that even without the soundmate a MP3 sound loud and nice even when using just the built-in speaker.the soundmate just gives more "ohm" to the sound.The voice clarity function is great, I can't heard the background noise(buzzing) when talking to my friend even while he's walking along a busy street. Reception was good too.

Nice design and LCD,icon based interface(finally)



Plus points:
Nice and sleek design
Vibrant and nice LCD
Nice sound output
Good reception with noise filter
bluetooth enabled(finally)
no need for properiety software to transfer contents

minus points
so-so camera(not much improvement in quality over the e700a)
too little memory 96MB only and no expansion slots for mem cards.
high pricing

Nice phone to have if you are not a very techie gadget freak.

The day my e700a died...

Sighz told myself that I should curb my spendings but then just when I said that my precious Samsung e700a died..., yes RIP on Sat, 17th Jul The LCD screen just blanked off..just like tat it has become like this:

Ah no phone for me is like dd without a digital camera..very tong ku so the next day I strucked a deal with a guy for a set of D500C for $485 with unfilled warranty card means still wif full warranty lah. but then I still feel abit cheated by this seller.
Drat, I never checked the items properly, partly bcos he was very late (745pm) and i was a bit anxious to go home and I usu have no probs wif such transactions... Frankly prior to that I have no chance to check what's in the standard package of the D500C. He told me that it's std package with xtra battery that's why i willing to pay $485. but then when I went home and double check, missing from the box is the english operating manual and the soundmate. shit! I contacted him immediately...even though he did replied, till now I still haben got the stuffs I requested although he promised that he will give me. then grrr... I went to Sim Lim Sq with some frens today(cos they wan to buy RS-MMC card). then saw this soundmate selling for $35, managed to bargain down to $18 then I just bought it lah..aiyah curse my luck lah.. now just pressuring him to get the english manual back to have the full set back so that when I trade in will be more valuable...
next time when u wan to buy from a guy with this mobile num, plz beware!
96805430

Wah spent alot last weekend cos of the D500C and also bought a bluetooth dongle for $16.90 to transfer data between my D500C and PC.

These are my new gadgets...
my soundmate and Bluetooth Dongle

...and my D500C

Hurray! managed to fixed my e700a after much difficulty and have to spend $4 on a special set of screwdrivers to open up the screws of the casing..although the LCD still cranky...color also very funny.. see below..

Curbing Spending Habits

I just realised that spending $$ can be pretty infectious. I don't know why but I suddenly feel like buying alot of stuffs. Guess it started with my Benq DVDRW which I bought got $99, been aiming for a DVDRW for quite something, think about a year already ... After that purchase, the floodgates seems to be open, I keep wanting to buy stuffs. Like MP3 player, a faster computer(need MB and CPU+RAM), and now eyeing for a new handphone(Samsung D500C). just bought a canon ixus 500 wif dd so cannot spend anymore else will have no more $. Have to stop all these tots...else will end up wif no $$ soon...

Hmm I just found that my blog is pretty boring, haha almost 90% are words ...not much pictures...

Ok uploaded all pics my "wants"

Samsung D500C

Samsung Yepp MP3 player

Dream Homestead

Was cycling at Bt Panjang when I came pass these flats. Quite near to my dream flat design already haha cos I always envisioned myself living in a flat with a full windowed living room.
All pics taken with my trusty Samsung e700a which have been with me for a year plus liao but now showing some signs of old age..

Notice the full-sized windows... can get quite a majestic view of the outside from ur living room, dun even need to stand near the window ledge...
Are the flats nice? Do they look like condominiums? They are all HDB flats!

Really hope that one day i can own one of these flats and live in it with my loved one... Guess that will probably gonna take quite a long time still...

Feel so Cheated!

Grr..
just recieved my new SAFRA card, Thought that my safra membership will automatically be void once the old card expired this March but little did I know that they deduct $32 from my IPPT money and send me the new card... Sound a bit like those credit card scam rite? they never inform me that the membership will be automatically renewed if I didn't inform them... Feel so cheated.. hard to imagine such a big (and rich) organisation also uses such "tactics"...

One happy thing is that I've recieve the last instalment of my pay from Toshiba... hohoho good now nobody owe me any money (IPPT money also in already, but $32 short), also means no more money coming in sob... sob..

Haiz yesterday failed my first job interview.. Interviewed by a guy from IDS International... he said he's a IT company, very big and a MNC..and he's the software vendor for the dutch bank ABN AMRO need assistants like us to install his so-call security software to every users. During the interview, he asked for the EXACT words /sentence I would use to "persuade" the users to let me install the software into their computers. Wow sounds abit like sales right? guess i am not eloquent enough ..I beta stick to being a engineer haha.. anyway take the interview as a learning experience lor..no hard feelings on hearing that I dun really like the job also (haha no sour grapes here..)

Had a little tiff wif dd yesterday, I know she's under alot of stress this week because she suspect her dog got illness. somemore she's worried about her confirmation. so everytime I "type" to her in MSN, I will get the "NO MOOD" response..every conversation sure have this words.. make me quite frustrated as well cos typing to her is like she's not that interested also... her whole mind is about her doggie.. I think the best way is not to talk to her till sat after she visited the vet(with her dog of cos). Only then will she set her mind at ease. then can talk..else typing/talking to her grrrrrr make people feel so frustrating, can't help but make a jibe at her yesterday...

I feel I've slipped further down the rungs again... To me, I feel like my status is just her punching bag, for her to vent frustrations at me. whereelse all her love is divided between her dog, her family and her car. I feel so unimportant... way behind all those things/persons I've mentioned. Last time is only persons, now still have a dog and a car slotted in front of me..pushing me further down... She always say I can take care of myself so she pays more attention to her dog, but being able to take care of myself means I dun need TLC from my beloved? mabbe I am just being too sensitive (or it's because I am too free these days to think abt all these)watever the case I can't help but feel that I am more and more "unimportant" to her...

The dd I wan is someone who will love me with all her heart and must place a certain "importance" to me. At least she must make me feel that I'm important to her. And this is the dd I used to know in the past. but now with the new additions and new love I dun feel that "importance" anymore. Or rather I am feeling more and more unimportant...

Perharps I should contract a serious illness then I will know how and where she values me...

NDP Preview Tickets!

Yeah I got my NDP preview tickets...
Though it's not the tickets to the actual day but still very happy cos I think I haven't been able to get such tickets for quite a long time already...
No need to queue overnight also..Yeah! Got a pair means can go with dd liao...
Look here's the tickets below...

NS = King ah?

My younger bro recently got enlisted into army, been complaining that he got no time for this and for that lah...so my mum took his words literally and helped him with this and tat. Like when he needed some stuffs, she would go and buy it for him straightaway... or she would ask my youngest bro to serve him..like bring him his food and drinks (up to him) etc...

And then the problem is I don't see him having no time to do these stuffs himself, when he comes back he would be on the computer playing games or writing blogs or in MSN chating with god-knows-who. If he comes back at 7pm( nites off) then he would be seated in front of the computer from 715(computer need sometime to startup) till 30-45mins before the time he needs to book in. and when he comes back for the weekends he would be seated the whole day pausing only for a 30min lunch/dinner break.

If he's tired bcos of NS training, he should be sleeping rite? I dun see such a case in him leh...And I definitely do see a need to treat him like a king (do everything for him) when he comes back...

Yesterday I so fed up with my mum's constant helping that I spoke up... Wah NS=King ah? must help him do everything, he cannot do by himself meh? perharps I have always been quite independent at home, whenever possible I tried to do everything myself instead of relying on others that's why I see my NS bro's behavior I am very pissed off... One time when the kettle is boiling and he never even bother to go turn off the gas when everyone is busy and he's the most free (playing computer games) he acted like he never heard the sound of the whistling kettle... Grrr...

Ok back to the topic, when I spoke up my mum say I am very selfish dun wan to help him blah blah blah and not "qing qin" sibling love watever... wah kaoz! so angry with that remark. TO show that we care for siblings mean that we have to treat them like king? serve them? do watever they wan to do? then ok why not he serve me and help me do watever I wan? wat's this? *&%#@

then we went to the topic of buying b'fast every sun morn. usually it's either my parents of I went downstairs to buy... since they brought up this topic so I reminded them that it's usu. me... then my dad says the others haben wake up so i should go buy..wah so means that those who wake up early will have to serve those who wake up late lah? waking up late bcomes a excuse for laziness? my fault for waking up early?
where's the logic? I tell u this, my eldest bro and the NS bro sometimes purposely dun wan to wake up cos they dun wan to go down and buy b'fast. actually they have already woken but they still lie in bed. How come I noe, cos when I open the door when i came back wif b'fast, they would then come out...very sharp one timing also precise... coincidence mabbe? haha I doubt so.. so I was complaining that it's quite unfair... then my mum started all her cock-and-bull story of wat qing qin lah bros must help lah etc....

Grrr.....

Super Sianz Ahhhhhhhhh!

Just finished my attachment, so sianz at home nothing to do...Sighz can't find a suitable temp job also...so wat to do? gotta stay at home and rot lor...haha
nothing to do so decided to write(or type) lor...

Ah dd's family having problems financially again... common occurance boo hoo hoo. heard from dd that her mum have to go prawn jewlleries to buy clothes(~$200) for her bro and a $500 cupboard to keep his medals and game consoles.
I dunno why but i find them to be a strange family, they always seems to like the idea of spend-first-plan-later while i believe in doing things in the inverse way that is plan-first-spend-later. It seems that their parents like to buy those expensive stuffs even though sometimes they will be penniless after that. Why? I just dun understand...from wat dd say her dad wants to protect her and her bro so that ppl will not look down on them. So mabbe her dad(& mum) thinks that by having all the ex stuffs , it will show that they have a certain standard of living and ppl will not look down on them... Wat's the point? They are not that poor neither are they that rich... why must they keep buying stuffs that are not that important? I heard a salesman tell me this and I think it's very meaningful... "In Singapore you wun die, if you can only are poor than u live a poorer lifestyle lor, if you are rich then u live a richer lifestyle" which is very true. if you are poor what for u try to live a rich lifestyle? if ppl wan to look down on u then let them lor, wat's more impt? face or filling ur stomach? buying expensive stuffs can't fill ur stomach when u are hungry rite? Dunno y they can't see that...I think I may be wrong to critise her family like that but I think sometimes frm my observation over the years that her parents (esp her mum) are still quite naive... backdated thinking
and her bro too - should know that they have some problems financially, so should try to help by spending less and not spend more... so wat if he signs on? if he earns more then he will spend more...

dd's parents always ask her for $$, and never from her bro. dunno wat kind of thinking is that... mabbe they think that daughter will get married then will b other ppl's daughter already so must use the chance to squeeze every cent from her... and poor dd always have to give in to them cos she's very soft-hearted (to them only) even though she can scream and shout at every other person (including me). so all her $$ will be channeled there.

I used to have a wishful thinking that the big sum of $$ needed for our marriage can be saved by the both of us.. but I guess such a tot is pretty far-fetch now. If she keeps giving them $ then she can't save. If she dun give she will be the "unfillial child". Anyway I've quarrelled many times with her over these so much so until I am so sick and tired of these. She have to choose which side to "scarifice". Either our marriage plans or her parents guess it's quite a tough decision. But guess her parents is more important than anything else... Frankly speaking, I really wish she could contribute some amount to the marriage funds bcos the sums involved is really quite large...

So wat can I do? just have to keep trying to save as much as possible lor...else how? dunno how long that's gg to take...Lucky thing is that my parents(at least for now) are not like hers else really die ..think we will not be able to get married tis lifetime liao..

Anyway I think keep giving her parents $$ whenever they wan is also not a solution...
Must try to work frm the bro and her parents...ask them to change, make her bro realise the situation they are facing... and her parents to realise wat they are doing is so senseless...

If they had planned for everything years earlier and started saving then perharps now her bro dun even need to sign on to get the $$ for his Uni fees... No Big TV, no DVD player, NO PS2, no Home theatre speakers, No camcorder, No $1000 handphone... somemore they bought it when the product was just launched, imagine the price they paid then and the price now... haha all bcos of some "face" issue...
Anyway ppl will noe that her bro signed on bcos of the $$ (even though some ppl signed on bcos they LOVED SAF, but who believes?), and wat does that means? most ppl will think that it's cos his family not $$ to send him to U... so see the pt? ex or no ex gadgets, we have come one full circle and still "lose face"....

Double Happiness

So happy this week,
Recieved a call from the NDP organisers on thursday that my application for a NDP preview ticket have beeen successful haha...So many years didn't go NDP already so happy and excited that I managed to get 2 tickets from the ballot. Although it's only a preview ticket but I am contented at least there are many many more other singaporeans who can't get any tickets...haha Actually I am more concern abt the goodie bags haha always got many things inside...haha

Then sat(which is today) went for my 2nd non-ICT IPPT at Maju Camp. So happy managed to get GOLD again... My left shoelaces came off halfway during the 2.4 KM run then I have to re-tie it so worried that this little incident will make me lose many seconds and there goes my GOLD and my $400 from the govt...But luckily still managed to make it back in time for GOLD.. Yeah! gonna get $400 more in acct soon... more $ into my "L" driving funds hehe

Yesterday eat roti prata at Bukit Timah with dd, expensive roti prata and not nice somemore... worse than the roti prata then the ones sold at the coffeshop near my place. Grrr... kena cheated by dd's brother say that they roti prata there nice...Even a "sui pian" eater like me also find the prata there not nice. can even taste some uncooked flour...

Yesterday was also my Last day at Toshiba Electronics... Well nothing special from any of my bosses, small and big bosses also nv treat me lunch, dinner or anything..super stingy. Spent the last 2 days writing codes to analyse directories and MP3/WMA files cos I am TERIBBLY BORED...make my boss so happy cos means he got 1 thing less to do mah haha...

Aiyah now out of job no $ anymore, called a few job agencies but they also can't find any suitable temp jobs for me(cos I only got 1 more month free mah) think gonna stay at hm and rot till sch reopen liao lor... looking forward to next month...if dd kena confirmed than we can go celebrate and eat CRABs! long time no eat crabs liao lor...Yum Yum. Maybe I will be the one paying lah but nvm...DDs shouldn't be too calculating to each other right?

Lost Control

I don't know why these few days I've been jittery. I keep fearing that dd will not be able to save $. Or fear that even if she do manage to save, her $ will be siphon off by some people. I know dd dun like me to keep bringing this up and I kept telling myself not to think about this matter, I dun know why I just can't. Maybe it's because I had high hopes for our future. Or mabbe it's because I still can't get over the fact that i help dd to purchase her car but now I am left with nothing.
Or it's the combination of both. I guess it's the fear of losing everything. I've no choice, I've to write it down somewhere..

I am left puzzled, previously, she's so adamant that she put her savings into our OUB acct to keep them away from the prying eyes of her mum, but now all of a suddenly she's dropped her interest totally, very unwilling to do so. a full 180 degrees change. I know their family's spending habits that's why I still think it's a better idea to keep them in a safe place. I will NEVER touch the $. Maybe it's beacause she is afraid that I will runaway with her $. If we can't even have the simple trust between us then how are we gg to live together in the future?

I guess the best thing for me to do now is to forget the whole matter, and leave everything to fate, do it in her family's style if got $ then marry if no $ then wait.. wait.. wait... Guess that's the only way to keep all of us happy, at least most...
All I need now is answer, an assurance from dd that she will safeguard her $ carefully and keep steering towards our common cause. Somehow or rather I feel that she's hiding something from me and i feel it's some $ things. perharps i am too sensitive, afterall to me, there's suppose to be no secrets between us.

Must quickly forget the whole thing and be happy again...

No more driving lessons blogs

Hmm I think I shall not write anymore stuffs about my practical driving lessons in my blog anymore. Whenever I write something, someone says that I am showing off when everything I wrote is the entire truth just a narration of wat happen that day. to think that it's the same person who ask me to write and that person seems uninterested to listen to my mini adventures also, shall not "show off" anymore...Grrr...

Coffers running low already, must think of ways to spend less and/or generate some income...Coming to the end of my attachment, going to be out-of-job soon. Dunno whether to find some work or rest till school reopens, next year is going to be tough, most of my frens went overseas to take a break already. No $ for me sighz think, for my case cannot rest for the month long holiday, have to find some work, hopefully to "replenish" my dwindling $ supply.

Driving Lesson #4

Today went for my 4th practical lesson, car died when I was trying to move up a slope from stop position. Haha too anxious according to my instructor, but nevertheless that's the only time my engine died for the whole lesson. Today we went to bukit panjang and Yew Tee to tour, every driving lesson seems like a joyride to me and my instructor. My insructor said that my driving skills on the public road is OK already that's why he never teach me how to make turns because I am doing OK, he said I just need to polish up the way I view hazards at traffic junctions. And of cos I still need to go to carpark to learn some parking and to sharpen my turning skills. then I can stop for a while and wait for my practical test. Wah so happy, my instructor actually regard me so highly, I only attended my 4th lesson leh. Anyhow today I managed to improve on my clutch -accelerator control. Not that much jerks liao, quite smooth....but i feel I must still practise more...He said after a few more lessons than must go to a carpark and practise parking already, and mabbe also moving off on slopes that I think I am quite weak, strangely I executed the same movement as I did for army trucks but it's not that smooth for car and engine even died once. Hmmm think the 2 methods are different must get the army driving out of my mind and concentrate on car one... Ah another thing, same comments from him about me every lesson, "I am too safe!"
Must quickly pass the test, so that I can drive dd around...pray pray...

Driving Lesson #3

Well just finished my 3rd driving lesson, nothing eventful for this lesson. Raining the whole while. So my view is kinda foggy plus my instructor car's wiper isn't all that excellent thus no matter what speed I turn to, after every wipes the windscreen is still abit on the foggy side haha. But nvm still can see... Think his wiper is abit loose...haha
today he made me do alot of turns at the minor roads in bukit batok, right turns, left turns alot of turns turn until my head is also turning. Strangely today he never take me on the 70km/h road and let me cruise at 70km/h like he did last lesson. The moment i hit about 65km/h, he told me to turn left (the 70km/h rd is the only road from my plc to bukit batok)into bukit batok.
He taught me to use my horn at jaywalkers and to c how to react according to jaywalkers who are in the midst of crossing the road or begining to cross the road. then outside Bukit Batok Drving Center (BBDC) I got to use wat he taught me. I horned at my first jaywalker a auntie lah who was trying to cross the road at the time, the moment she step out of the kerb i sound the horn already. Haha
One thing I find puzzling about my driving lessons and/or my driving instructor. He never tell me since lesson #1 when to start turning the steering wheel or when to return the steering wheel. He only taught me things to look out when turning. Even when I am makin sharp left turns, He only told me to look out for traffic and the blind spots... never told me how to and how much to turn the steering wheel at all. all the while I have been using my "fee" to make turns.. He simply have forgotten about that or I was doing the turns fine thus he think no need to teach me the turning parts? I dunno
The moment i started driving in his car he would chit chat with me about many things non stop until we ended driving and he would play his oldies music on the radio, instructor's job like very relaxing hor? haha
Oh then today also went to top up petrol at the Esso stn beside BBDC, Drat have to squeeze in between 2 cars who are also pumping petrol at that time to get to a pump. Luckily no buang any1 of them, he still ask me whether got enough space or not, I replied yes then he told me 'squeeze' through already. he trust me the "L" driver so much ah...haha
Overall I think today my driving is OK lah think should be quite good already, however I think I still abit "gan cheong" (panicky) when driving through junctions and still the vehicle jerks abit when moving off from rest(sometimes). Have to improve on these things. Instructor also say I am too "safe", keep looking at the sides when turning...tell me to confirmed already then go, no need to scare haha..Looks like next lesson have to be more daring and aggressive abit..haha

Drving Lessons

Haiz just starting my practical driving lessons, not very smooth, still can be improved..here are wat happen

LEsson #1
The instructor talked to me about some "theories" about the car and stuffs for almost an hr then I drove to Yew Tee and back the whole journey taking about 30mins. basically the instructor wans me to learn how to keep in lane and practice the clutch "biting point" and accelerator control. Alas my experience with driving is with big army trucks where their clutch and accelerator are stiffer. anyway no excuses, I kinda panick cos I am not used to the vehicle so the vehicle was jerking when it move from rest many of the times. anyway the instuctor complained that I was too slow though i was driving at about 50km/h whenever I can. Next time will try to drive faster.

Lesson #2
Today instuctor wan me to practice moving off without jerking, hmm initial stages I was doing quite well and I managed to get moving without much jerks. Then we drove to bukit batok where I drove at 70km/h at the long stretch of road. Ah this time he never complain that I was too slow. Then at those normal roads I drove at 50+ km/h this time he complain that I was too fast haha. Anyway today my leg control wasn't that good cos at some stage my legs were wobbling(make me throw clutch) and I dunno why thus today the car stalled a couple of times, 3 to be exact. haha mabbe I never adjusted the seat properly cos my heel seem to be stuck to the floor board thus I can't release the clutch properly. Will have to improve on this in the next lesson. Next we practice turning right at a junction where there are more than 1 right turning lane. Drat...I am too used to turning into the left-most lane thus when I switch to turn in the right-most lane I don't know the exact way to turn, i move straight then turn when i am in line with the lane(this is the method for turing into the left-most lane) then I got horned by the car beside me cos i was cutting into his lane..haha have to get this into my head that I am not driving a MID vehicle anymore...still need alot of improvements ah..like the checking blind spot part keep forgetting cos nv do it for long time already and I keep making wide turns(too used to long trucks grrr..)..haha
I think I trying to do too many things at same time thus make me very gan cheong (panick) must try to keep calm and relax abit.

Starting Driving lessons

Ah quite a busy day today, went to take my Final Theory test today, took only 20mins to finish the 50 qns which is even faster than the time I took for my Basic Theory Test.
Oh well hopefully I can pass the FTT. Pray...pray
then afternoon at 4pm started my 1st driving lesson...The instructor talk about everything about driving for an hour then let me drive for 30mins. drove to Yew Tee and back. Ah today didn't drive very well cos long time no drive already plus the controls are not as stiff as military vehicles. thus the feel is different guess I need more practice to be famalise with the car controls.
then the instuctor wan me to learn drv for 2 hrs per session...sighz gg to b tough on my pockets liao ...anyway promised my dd that I will learn and pass driving.
so guess the most important thing is to pass driving and not the $ part...

Panicky

Sighz rather panicky these few weeks. All because of DD's parents discovering that she now owns a car. Worried about wat? Well

1)Worried that she don't have the discipline to save for the car insurance, road tax ...then until the nearing the year end then she start to panick and save like mad.

2)Worried that her parents would ask her to buy these buy that for her "new" car until she has not enough $ to spend for the month.

3)Worried that her parents or bro would ask her to "lend" her car to her bro for some "driving lessons" around the carpark.

4)Worried that she will lend her car to her frens/relatives watever then they will buang(involved in accident). (And of cos won't pay for repairs) or she herself get involved in those accidents(non fatal) then she wun have $ to send in the car for repairs because of 1,2.

5)Worried that she would wan to "Show Off" then take her frens/relatives watever on joyrides to far places which will waste alot of petrol causing her to exceed her monthly budget.

6)Worried that because of 1,2,4 and 5 she will used up the $ meant for marriage.

This is why last week, I've sort of lost control of my emotions when she went to some re-spraying(which i feel is not needed). I dunno if she did sense that I really dun wan her to go, or that she nv did considered my feelings at all. I do realise that she would want to restore all minor defects to her new baby but to me I look at the bigger picture, think that it's better to let it be for the moment. Sometimes I think our roles are swapped, I am the more sensitive female and she is the male. Anyway these matter is over liao...so no pt talking abt it anymore.

Aiyah I also dunno why I became so paranoid, after all it isn't my car. Perharps I am also a bit attached to it as I went with her to every stage from the booking of the car to the collection of the car.
I kept saying that the $ for marriage I will save myself, but perharps I dun really meant what i said. I do hope that she can contribute some amount, but wif her parent's constant "gold panning" and her reluctant to refuse them I know it's gonna to be hard.However in my heart I do wish that she could at least try. I don't wan myself to be debt-ridden just because of marriage. With the job market so insecure, it's even more un-advisable to chalk up so much debts.

Planning to learn driving, but can't seem to find a suitable drving instructor, sianz cheap and preferably some1 acquainted, worried that i may get cheated by some stranger(after all planning to take from private instructor) lah haha. Those who collect fees from you then "disappear"

Let It Be...

SighZzz dd says she hated me now...
Perharps I did something wrong in agreeing on sat nite to let her send into the workshop but in fact I was silently hoping that she could back off at the last minute.
I keep telling myself to let it go, forget it...and I almost did..
then when the whole thing took so long until we can't even meet yesterday I became very angry again, Somemore when dd called to informed me that the whole thing could take quite a while, she sounded happy, like she thinks tat the $ was well-spent and it should b spent...All along to me it's a total waste...
the more I think abt it the siller I feel abt the whole thing then I could turn to no one but to write them all down...
I always think that we could sort things out but she got angry after reading what I wrote in the heat of the moment...now she dun even wan to talk to me...Fine
Let me be my fault, all my fault... I shouldn't have been too meddlesome, shouldn't have expect so much frm her, should have let her do everything her way, shouldn't have talk so much or provided her advices/solutions in the hope that she will follow them...(she never did anyway, facing me she has a mind of her own, facing others she will be manipulated by them)

Ya u can say I am calculating becos I keep reminding her abt $, but wat can I do? u wan me to stand and watch she sink deeper into the mire? or wait until everything's too late then start to voice out. I wan her to have a budget so that she will have enough to spend every month and possibly even some spare cash... No need to dig into her savings at all..U imagine this, if every month u have to dig into ur savings cos u are over budget then very soon even this little savings will run out. I dun wan her to develop this happen of keep touching her savings only use for emergencies...Is that wrong? Is that calculatives? why can't she see the hidden agenda?

She said she does have marriage on her minds..ya like keep saying that she wans this and tats for marriage. So this is her way of saying she have marriage on her mind right? As I mentioned earlier, mabbe I was wrong to expect too much frm her or expect her to put in the same effort as me..but in order to let her b a happy n beautiful bride I am constantly cracking my head on how to save more $, scimping and pinching everyday, then sudddenly u saw this "extravagant" thing happen, who won't be upset? At that instance I really feel that all my efforts are wasted u noe? Why can't she view it this way?

In my views, I dun think pacifying will get anyway, after all she've been pacifying her(her mum) and giving in all these years already but then wat happened? the same thing happen over and over again. So I feel perharps a hard approach would be better. Men are like tis u give them an in they wan a yard... when u r firm and they noe that they cannot gain any advantage then they will back off... After all they are mum n daughter so can't possibly carry on like tis 4ever...TO me she's please cos she has got her way and to put it crudely is "gloating" I dun understand why she's so happy over this...

She always say I dun understand her but have she taken some time to care about how I felt anot? HAve she ever taken time to note that throughout all these while she have never really listen and carry out any of my words, SHe will always listen to everyone except me. Wat other people told her is advice wat I told her is all crap.
I am sorry if I am too direct, I never chew my words...I was not born to please but to solve problems in the most correct way.

Who says I dun understand her? it's precisely this that I am so worried for her.
-I noe her mum is like that so I must ask her to stand up for herself keep giving in is definitely not a solution
-I noe she don't save that's why I ask her don't if possible touch her savings unless it's for emergencies, tis case is a non emergency and she went to touch of cos I am worried for her...
-I noe she will get angry(but didn't expect her to be so upset) but some1 will have to be the bad guy right?to constantly remind her else sooner or later everything will return to sq 1.

Anyway I've decided to give up, If she wants to carry on like this Let it be...I wash my hands off everything then perharps she will be happier and wun be sandwiched between her mum n me... I'll continue to play 2nd fiddle, shut my mouth up and just save $ quietly myself.Perharps this is the most ideal solution to her.After all in her eyes, I am nothing but a calculative, unreasonable, hard feeling , ignorant idiot who does not noe anything but scolding people....

My intentions not being appreciated is 1 thing, but being misunderstood is another...and it's really saddening